Veronica Mars
Veronica Mars

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: A- | 743 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
When A Moon Hits Your Eye Like A Big Pizza Pie...

An alarm sounds, as a woman hustles out of the administrative office past Veronica. VMVO tells us that she set off Clemmons's secretary's car alarm, which was "pure Bond." If the secretary doesn't take lunch at the same time as Clemmons, as indicated previously (but which I can't say I really bought then, anyway), I wonder how Veronica got past her last week. I doubt the typical Bond/Moneypenny interaction would have worked, not that I wouldn't have loved to see Veronica give it a try. Anyway, Veronica tries to get in, but the lock's been changed. VMVO gripes, "Man, he's gotten paranoid!" Hee.

Veronica waits outside a classroom until Butters appears. He looks none too pleased to see her, although the fact that she calls him "Vincent" should have been the first clue that she wants something. I will not be calling him that, despite the fact that I'm awfully quick to drop nicknames. Veronica gets right to the point, asking Butters for help in getting to the box of confiscated stuff on Mac's behalf, and saying that this is a good opportunity for Butters to stick it to his dad. Butters says that he gets to do that plenty, no doubt referencing the radio show. What Butters doesn't know is that Clemmons, like everyone else, gave up "Ahoy Mateys" after Krunk died with a disgusted "That Imitation Crab is such a tool." Just as well -- Butters has enough self-image problems as it is. Anyway, in return for the office access, Butters wants to go to prom with Mac. Veronica mischievously agrees, "I think that can be arranged." See, Veronica, now you're thinking. Pimping could totally pay for your college education! Butters tells Veronica to meet him in his dad's office after the last bell: Clemmons has "bus-circle duty," whatever mindless, soul-sucking job that might be...

...but now it must be going on, as Veronica, Mac in tow, slowly knocks on Clemmons's door three times. Butters answers the door, and disgustedly asks, "That was your secret knock?" Veronica: "The genius is its simplicity." I'm hoping that's what I'm going to be saying at the end of the season, but I'm sensing that's not going to be the case. Butters points Veronica to the box and says that they have exactly eleven minutes, and this isn't exactly The Great Train Robbery, kid, so chill. Mac gratefully tells Butters that this is "way cool" of him, but Butters starts babbling that he's an excellent dancer but that they totally don't have to dance and that he doesn't want to get the wrong corsage and whatever. He's actually somewhat nervously endearing here, which is too bad, because I doubt that they're going to let Mac go to the prom when she's awaiting trial for braining Veronica with her laptop. Seriously, I do think that Veronica just made a judgment call that Mac would take the unpleasant evening over not getting the interceptor back, but it is kind of crappy for her not to have said anything about it, particularly since she clearly talked to Mac about this meeting, and, therefore, had the opportunity. Also, considering the fact that this break-in would no doubt cause Veronica to lose the precious Kane Scholarship, it might behoove all of them to take this conversation outside. But Veronica first asks Butters (I guess he's the first person Clemmons will suspect with the locks changed) whether she can return a copy of The Anarchist's Cookbook she found in the box to Weevil, like there's any reason he would have been keeping that at school instead of at home. I mean, as much of a bad-ass as he may be, it would be just a bit imprudent for him to read that in Chem lab, right? Butters is amazed that Veronica knows Weevil's locker number, but she shows him that it's "333": "Who else would brag about meeting Satan halfway?" One, since when can students pick their own lockers, and two, that's awfully heavy-handed and Smurfy. I mean, Weevil indirectly, but intentionally, caused a hail of concrete to rain down on Thumper. Weevil is a bad-ass. Do we need to belabor the point? Anyway, Butters agrees, and then turns to Mac: "I'm thinking white limo. If that's cool." Hee. Mac looks down defeatedly, but at least she's got her interceptor back to remind her of all the sex she's not having.

Veronica Mars

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