Veronica Mars
Not Pictured

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: C+ | 68 USERS: A
Leave It To Beavil

Veronica enters a Woody's Burgers and looks at some Sharks memorabilia that just happens to be displayed there for some reason. Maybe this is where The Woodman serviced...I mean, "served" his first customer. In the 2002 photo, Veronica finds a name she apparently hadn't seen before: "Derek Applegate." What she also hadn't seen before, though, is a line on the bottom that reads, "Not Pictured: Cassidy Casablancas." A visual "DUN DUN DUN!" effect emphasizes Veronica's shock, as we go to commercial.

In the bathroom, Veronica looks like she's just lost her lunch. And she didn't even find a finger in it. Cut to outside, where she's urgently calling someone, and then we're at the party. I don't know -- Veronica's in daylight, although it is maybe starting to fade, and it's not like the party couldn't have started early, but given that she seemed to be planning on going to it, the timeline seems a little conveniently fucked here. She had hours to run this errand, it seems likely enough to me, and I doubt she chitchatted with Jackie for long after the part of the conversation we saw. Anyway, we see Mac and Beaver enter the party, and Mac's phone vibrates in its pouch on her side, but she doesn't notice. Veronica leaves a message for Mac, telling her that she needs to get away from Beaver at all costs because he's dangerous. First you tell her to relax, and then you go and leave a message that's going to make her all tense. How is the poor girl ever supposed to score any action? Veronica calls information and asks for the listing for Hart Hansen, who either has his own phone line, or is one of those emancipated minors I've been hearing so much about. If it's the latter, though, he's probably got a suite at the Neptune Grand, so that will be convenient.

At the party, Beaver chugs a beer, as Dick exhorts him and Mac watches. Dick's pleased at the performance, and he goes off in search of fresh meathead. Beaver suggests to Mac that they check out the room, and Mac makes a joke about "liquid courage" that's as ill-advised as her over-applied blue eye shadow and her decision not to continually check her voicemail for the first time in her life. They head towards the room, when Corny, rather irritatingly, tells them the news that Keith caught The Woodman....

...and then we're in a dark room, wherein something is happening under the sheets of a large bed. Next time you're in a nervous situation with a woman, fellows, down a beer and mention a child molester. Works every time. Mac's phone goes off again in the foreground. So she took it out of the pouch, but didn't check her messages? I could believe that of some people, but not Mac. Especially since she must have had a moment to herself -- that beer would have gone through a little thing like Beaver in about two minutes flat. Also, I hate to cast aspersions on the abilities of the uninitiated, but the movements of whatever poor production assistant under the covers is making it look like one of the kids is on PCP, while the other's on heroin. I suppose events to come will give strong clues as to who's on what.

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Veronica Mars




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