Neptune High hallway, where Mac snags Veronica and immediately offers a "preemptive apology" for the conversation they're about to have. I hope that extends to me, because I so do not want anything less than strictly above-board awesomeness for Mac and Beaver, on a personal and relationship level. Although I guess the sparse but intense cuteness there kind of means they're due for a blasting. Mac: "Beaver and I occasionally make out." Instead of doing six Hail Marys and saying she's made her peace with that, like I did, Veronica hmms in that way she has: "I made out once, back in the day. I think he had me pinned up against a woolly mammoth," leaning up against her locker to pantomime. Mac admits that she's not an expert, but isn't it true that, after four months, dating a typical high-school boy, there would be some under-the-bra action? Firstly, trade "months" for "minutes." Secondly, stop right there, Majorino. Because I know that one in three Neptune students is either gay or highly open to the possibility, but not my little Cassidy. Not only would that mean his total dissolution -- I've seen how the seedy gay Neptune High subculture deals with its own -- but also, as stated, I'd lose the office pool on Dick Casablancas, because you know one of them is, but it's pushing it to say both. So just like that, I've got fitty bucks riding on Cassidy Casablancas being horribly abused all of a sudden, in the quick click of a pause button, and that's eighteen kinds of horrible, because you don't want hateful people having to go through that, much less lovely people like the Beav. Which I guess could be the point. It makes me want to go on a vigilante spree through the streets of Neptune, Passover marks on every Boatloads of Fun front door just for fucking starters, and we're exactly four lines into the scene. Actually, though, the superhero talk is clearly just cover for the fact that it makes me want to cry just thinking about it and I don't want this to be happening in any way regardless of the truth or what happens next, because it's awful enough thinking about this stuff happening to either of the brothers, frankly, even as an aside, and this season seems to lead inexorably forward into horrible, horrible, horrible. Which is, I know, how the whole show started, so I'm not walking in blind, but God that's tough. Am I just inventing sexual abuse because I assume that, since I'm recapping this week, we're going to have boatloads of it? Jokes aside, gay Cassidy's a lot easier to take. The RAINN jokes aren't coming so fast and easy all of a sudden.
Episode Report CardJacob Clifton: A | 1216 USERS: B-
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