So like, you guys? Remember last month, when we got a rerun when this episode was scheduled to air, because it was supposedly too dark for the holidays? Well, I hate to admit it, but they might have had a point there, if only because it would have meant three Logan-less episodes in a row, which might have caused a holiday riot. A serial killer of teenage girls that had supposedly been caught resurfaces, causing the Mayor of Neptune to hire Keith back to the sheriff's department on a temporary basis. This means, of course, that Keith has to work directly with Officer Fuckface. Un! Comfortable! But before we get to that, a kid hires Veronica to dig up dirt on his parents. Before long, everyone is trying to get the skinny on what the 'rents were up to in the seventies. I think these kids are bargaining for more therapy than they can afford, but then again, they are 09ers. When Mac, the computer whiz from "Like A Virgin," hears about it, she proposes taking Veronica onto the web so they can both make some big bucks. But before that, Mac asks Veronica to check into her parents. Veronica discovers that the hospital where Mac was born made the teeny-tiniest of errors, and long story short, Mac was Switched! At! Birth! And not only that, but it was with Madison Sinclair, 09er extraordinaire. Mac and Veronica crash Madison's party, where Mac meets her biological sister. And that's either her biological sister in real life, or the casting director deserves a raise. Mac goes to confront her biological mom, but chickens out at the last minute, although the mom clearly knows who Mac is. Officer Fuckface totally apprehends the wrong guy, leading to an amusing confrontation between Keith and Veronica. Veronica hits on a cute cop, and she might want to get on that, since he saves Keith's life before Keith catches the loser-ass killer. Veronica causes Cute Cop to be suspended, which...awkward. That happened because Veronica used him to investigate more of the Lilly Kane case. She learns who gave the anonymous tip to the police about Abel Koontz. It's Clarence Wiedman, head of security for Kane Software. That would have been slightly more revelatory if they hadn't given it away in the previouslies. But what they didn't give away? Veronica taking photos of Wiedman and drawing crosshairs on them. Did I mention that this was another fucking awesome episode? Well, it was. Happy New Year.
Before I get started, two things: First, Happy New Year! And second, for those of you that don't keep up with this stuff, this episode was originally supposed to air the week before "An Echolls Family Christmas," but UPN pulled it because they thought the material was too "dark" for the holidays. The last television programming that those associated with it referred to as "dark" was Buffy Season 6, so you'll forgive me if I take a moment to shudder all the bad associations out. Brrrr. I may need a liberal definition of "moment" on that one.
Veronica walks into the kitchen and wishes Keith a good morning, to which she receives a "You don't go to the Oceanside bars where the college kids hang out, do you?" in reply. Well geez, Keith, a girl's gotta get her reputation somewhere -- there's only so far a pair of panties will go. Or so my female friends tell me. Veronica makes a joke, but it's no laughing matter, as apparently the "E-string strangler" has struck again. So we're either looking for a person who has a fetish for guitar strings for that particular chord, or for a person who spends a lot of time online. It's probably the former, but considering some of the people whose posting privileges have been revoked on our site, I wouldn't rule out the latter. Veronica recalls that this was Keith's case, and thought they caught the guy in Oakland two years earlier. Keith bitterly exposits that the Mayor and the Chamber of Commerce were quick to believe that the Oakland strangler committed the Neptune crimes, but the profile didn't quite fit. That's interesting -- if Keith made a big stink at the time about the Oakland strangler not being the right guy, he might have been in Dutch with the city before the Jake Kane issue, making the Mayor more inclined to get rid of him. Man. Did I just say "in Dutch"? I did just have a birthday, but I turned thirty-five, not seventy.
School, outside. Wallace and Veronica are carrying hot dogs as he tells her that even "[his] mom is scared to drive home alone." That's the same mom that was intimidated by Psycho Aidan Quinn, right? Who was in turn intimidated by Keith's barking like a patron of the Maison de Sade restaurant in Chelsea? Wallace, your mom's the gold standard of bad-assery the way you're the gold standard of cool. Some dork interrupts them, telling Veronica he hears she does detective work. She dismissively says she does favors for friends. That's what your purity test said. Thank you! Geez, first I'm seventy, then I'm twelve. Maybe thirty-five is the average age of all my personalities. Is not. Is too! Is not! Is TOO!