The mystery of the week involves Bonnie -- of Tim and Bonnie and also Dick and Spinal Curvature Bonnie -- who suddenly found herself in the family way and then almost as suddenly found herself not so much anymore. However, the latter state came about only after someone slipped her RU-486, a.k.a. the Abortion Pill. Veronica's on the case and investigating both potential fathers: Dick, who wanted a paternity test before he spoke to Bonnie again, and Tim, who turned into the model expectant father. After a few red herrings that involved Bonnie's father's evangelical business (and business associates), Veronica unintentionally smokes out the real culprit: Bonnie's roommate, who had dreams for Bonnie that extended beyond barefoot pregnancy and a shotgun wedding. In other news, after Logan cops to hooking up with Madison and admitting that he lied to Veronica's face last week, he spends the rest of the episode acting distraught and pathetic. In order to assuage her day- and nightmares, in which visions of naked Madison and Logan dance in her head, Veronica gets Weevil to steal Madison's newest car with the idea of crunching it down into a tiny little metal box. Sadly for us grudge-holding, black-hearted, happily vengeful beings, Veronica gets religion and decides that giving in to anger isn't and sandy footstepped path she wants to follow.
Hello, dream sequence! Veronica is nestled happily in bed with Logan, but after she gets up and dressed -- much to Logan's languid protestations -- she finds herself on a snow-scaped balcony. Turning around, she sees Madison riding Logan like a hobbyhorse.
And then Veronica wakes up to a ringing phone. It's Logan, being cutesy about their special date that night, which Veronica is having none of, especially since she keeps seeing flashes of Madison throwing her hair around her naked shoulders. She gets off the phone quickly and VOs that every time she closes her eyes, she can see Madison and Logan doing the giant slalom in Aspen. Veronica needs to do something about her inward eye, because it's giving her neither bliss nor solitude.
At the library, Bonnie hesitantly approaches Veronica and quite shyly asks her to help Bonnie out with something: "I got pregnant and someone slipped me RU-486." "RU?" Veronica frowns, confused. Seriously? We're expected to believe that Veronica doesn't know what RU-486 is? That's just weird, and it undermines her character. Veronica is not that dumb. Bonnie explains that it causes a miscarriage, and that she wants Veronica to find out who did it.
Okay, I guess this would be a good place to point out that RU-486 and the "morning after pill," which is also known as Plan B, are not the same thing. One is taken after unprotected sex to prevent pregnancy from happening and the other -- RU-486 -- is taken to abort a pregnancy. Look, I'm a recapper and I get the attraction of being a punster, but as many have already queried, is a '70s music pun worth muddying the waters? ["Again?" -- Wing Chun] Given how political and important both RU-486 and the morning after pill are, I think not.
After the credits, Veronica wants to know if Bonnie is certain that the miscarriage wasn't a mistake. Bonnie tells her that her doctor determined that a rash and numbness in her hands and feet were signs of an allergic reaction to RU-486. The doc then did a blood test to confirm that RU-486 was indeed in her system. Veronica expresses her sympathy over the situation and says, "I'm looking for the least rude way to ask you if you know who the father was...and that's what I came up with." It was either Tim or Dick, and both of them knew about the pregnancy. At first, Bonnie was so freaked out that she asked if Dick would help pay for an abortion, but he demanded a paternity test before he shelled out any Casablancan cash. "Yeah, he's a classy dude," Veronica agrees. Tim, on the other hand, was really sweet and supportive. Veronica notes that Tim and Bonnie are back together. Bonnie acknowledges the Pi Sig party brouhaha, and says that she left Dick at the party to find Tim and beg his forgiveness. Veronica wants to know why Bonnie was with Tim in the first place, and Bonnie explains that he takes care of her: "He's like my dad in that way." Tim found out about Bonnie's pregnancy only when her parents sent her congratulatory balloons from "Grandma and Grandpa," and offered to marry her. "Your parents sent balloons?" Veronica demands, totally echoing my thoughts. Yeah, but Bonnie didn't tell them; her indiscreet and totally sueable family doctor did. Bonnie says that her parents finding out and Tim wanting to keep the baby changed her mind about getting an abortion. Would Tim still want the baby if it were Dick's? Veronica agrees to take the case, and promises that Tim won't know she's on it.