Russell comes home to the Virgin Vault. He and Dawnie discuss Ty some more. "So why don't you hate me?" he asks, since he was Ty's roommate and he knew about Ty's cheating ways, and she knew he knew. But Dawnie is like, "I didn't know." But Russell says that "we all knew," and furthermore insists that Dawnie knew and he knows she knows it. Dawnie wheels away from Russell and does The Dramatic Turning-Towards-The-Camera of Sudden Epiphany.
DA's office. Sam rattles off a status report in Standard American English. Vince acts like he doesn't even notice. Sam is pissed. Oh, we totally saw that coming.
Back at the Lonelyhearts Loft, Jesse lets in Russell. "I came as soon as I got your message," says Russell, who seems to have forsaken a life of his own to become Everyone's Swell Gay Friend. "Why do I attract rotten men?" complains Jesse. Well, maybe it has something to do with that pact you made with Satan to afford this seven-hundred-thousand-square-foot apartment all by yourself in New York City? Maybe you should see if there's a "rotten men only" clause in the fine print. Then she complains that the "geriatric phase" of her life is starting. Hey, Jesse? Do you have plans to fall and break your hip in the shower anytime soon? No? Then shut up. Russell, ever the swell gay friend, offers to make cookies.
Sam marches into "Callbacks" and says to Vandy: "It's time that you let me go. In here," gesturing to her heart. She says the "friend thing isn't working," blah blah, he needs to really try. "Okay, Sam," says Vandy, "but you have to let me let go. Who followed who to college? And who followed who to New York? And who keeps showing up in whose bar? Just who needs to let go of who, Sam?" And who can make the sun shine? The Vandyman can, the Vandyman can! Go, Vandy! Sam gets the point. She says that she's had to let go of so many things, "but it's really hard to let go of some of the good parts." And Vandy, she says, is the very best part. Aw. They agree to try being friends for the seventy-ninth time since the series began.
Dawnie comes home to see Ty setting up camp on the living room couch. Someone tell me again why he has to stay here at Pottery Barn, when over at Jesse's place there are at least three spare rooms the size of airplane hangars? Dawnie's changed her tune and she begins to apologize for whatever-the-hell-happened six years ago. She says she knew about all the cheating, because she knew Ty, but she didn't say anything, because she didn't want to lose him as a friend -- "I took what I could," she says, and for that she was just as dishonest as he was. I'd just like to say that I was almost kind of moved by this scene, mostly due to Brad Rowe's acting. "So what do we do now?" asks Ty. "Well, I don't know about you," says Dawnie, "but this is all going into my thesis." Yeah, Dawnie, as soon as you figure out how to cite that big, fat, non-existent book called All About Me in your footnotes. "You know," says Ty, "you never asked me what was in my pockets." "Let's see," says Dawnie. Ty stands and turns his lint-free pockets inside-out. "Empty -- now what does that mean?" I don't know, Ty. What about the back pockets? Maybe you should turn around. Oh, wait, you don't have back pockets? Well, could you just turn around anyway, Ty? Thanks.