Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A | Grade It Now!
Cheese Gotta Have It

Celia considers her daughter for a second before hissing: "I have a customer." The blinking, troubled customer buys some pants, which Celia applauds: "Go. Have children. See how they grow up to denigrate the fine city of Detroit, and call you a fucking bitch!" Nancy offers the woman a coupon, and pats her on the arm, because only Nancy knows what it's like to deal with Celia on a good day, much less an Isabelle day.

Later on, Celia's slumping through the house in a fuzzy robe, drinking wine right out of the box, and sits on the porch with Doug. He's wearing a suit while he does his laundry. His romantic line: "You got your tooth fixed. Wanna do it?" Heh. Celia points out how having sex with him was the first step in the complete destruction of her entire life. Doug reminds her that their sex was hilariously good, and she agrees just enough to be honest without doing him any favors. I remember their sex mostly as dangerously athletic.

They discuss their loneliness and the fact that he's already burnt through his quota of American Dream. He says that if he'd spent time with his gay kid, like Celia now has the chance to, things could have been awesome. "Gays are huge chick magnets." Man, when this show finally remembered his kid, it couldn't shake it. I feel like there's still a joke coming having to do with Doug's gay kid because they keep hitting it, but I can't imagine what it would be. There was sort of a sinister setup in the first season about that, so it would be really awesome if Doug suddenly turned hilariously gay or something. Celia tells him the hot young things Josh could pull in are well past Doug at his current age. He agrees, unless he gets rich again. She suggests that he go back to embezzling, and they talk about the therapeutic sea air. Not like a real conversation, but like what people think conversations are like.

Doug offers once more to bone her, and she says she's getting her FEMA vouchers in the morning and will be checking into a suite. "A few weeks, and then a few more to evict me..." Doug, meanwhile, has dropped his pants, junk swinging, to put on warm boxers from the dryer. Not exactly an overture, but Celia seems almost put off when he rebuffs her rebuttal, and heads to bed. He tells her to leave the wine and her WOMAN magazine.

At the estate sale, Shane gets into it with a guy, who tries to negotiate him down on a coffee table. Shane's starting ask is $125, the guy offers $80, Shane repeats $125 intensely, and the guy tries to knock off five, so Shane takes it up to $130: "Keep it up." Shane is so awesome. I love the Taylor Townsend version of him so much more than the Debbie Downer version. Which was, to be fair, also awesome, and his changes in the years since Judah's death make total sense. I always wonder what the boys were like before their dad died; I like to think it's something like they are now.

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