Back home, Andy teaches Shane how to use the nunchucks, instructing him on the "Dong Hai defense." How's that one work, again? "You protect your dong and swing like your life depended on it." Andy locks onto his crotch and twirls the 'chucks over his head like he's Michael Jackson at a rodeo, which is fitting because Silas busts into the kitchen with an "I need to talk to you, you fucking perv." Andy asks if "that loony chick from Alaska" called (not soon enough), but Silas is talking about that little thing where he e-molested Silas's girlfriend. Andy bullshits that he did that all for Silas, to teach him a lesson: just because she's handicapped doesn't mean Silas shouldn't be all up on that. Seriously, that's the lesson. And hey, Confucius, thanks and all, but Megan was the Blowjob Queen two episodes before we ever met her, so I'm not sure we needed that "lesson." Anyhoo, Andy wins me back by confirming to Shane the correct crotch-grip you need to swing those nunchucks.
Nancy comes home and immediately is all over Andy after overhearing the cyber-sex stuff. She yells at him that she wants him gone, tonight. Andy's all, "But I was just cooking dinner and I got some great recipes at my friend Conrad's joint earlier." The double entendres come fast and furious from Andy while Nancy barely avoids pummeling him: Pot roast, corned beef hash, baked ziti, and spaghetti
marijuana marinara. Nancy shoves him out to the back patio and wants to know what he did. He explains what happened at Heylia's earlier, giggling non-stop at the weirdness of Nancy's new profession. Nancy's fully pissed now and demands to know where her stuff is. Andy, finally getting serious, tells her it's safe. Nancy kind of curls up into a ball on the ground, lamenting Andy's newfound involvement in her double life. "Everything you touch turns to shit," she accuses. Andy says he's family. Nancy smiles and gives that half-laugh, half-sob thing she does sometimes and says she really wants him to leave. Andy recognizes that Nancy's in over her head and says, "You need some help, Nancy Pants." Nancy finally tells him not to call her "Pants" -- that was Judah's name for her, not his. "Whatever you think about me," says Andy, "Judah was my brother. And I loved him. And I have your back." He says he's going to go inside and make dinner for the family. "I'm making stoned crabs -- sorry, I had to get that one out. I was working on them all the way home." Nancy comes oh so close to a smile on that last one.