Elsewhere, I'm assuming in Majestic, Sullivan is giving Celia a tour of her brand new House of Kickbacks. He says it'll have to remain in the company's name in order to keep the bribery hush-hush, but Celia figures it'll keep Dean's "stubby little sausage fingers" away from it too. All of a sudden, something gets shot through one of the living room windows, and we see Doug driving golf balls into the house from his spot on the Majestic golf course. The balls are inscribed with either "whore" or "cunt," which must remind Celia of the good times with Doug. No, Celia's chagrined, actually, while Sullivan is grudgingly impressed by Doug's accuracy.
In a dimly-lit gym in a bad part of town (probably), Nancy's in a boxing ring, sparring with U-Turn. How the fuck...Nancy, seriously, what is the sequence of events that leads you into these situations? "Boxing gloves...uh, sure, U-Turn. Why don't you lace 'em up while I stammer ineffectually about you getting that smack out of my house?" Siiiigh. U-Turn, you will not be shocked to find out, has no intention of removing the heroin. He does, however, seem awfully serious when he tells Nancy that he's grooming her to be his lieutenant (he calls her "Grasshopper"), whether she wants to be or not. Marvin looks particularly alarmed at this revelation. U-Turn tells Nancy he's going to give her an address where she needs to meet him at 7:30 for a surprise. Hey, how can that end badly, Nance? You should totally go! The scene ends without U-Turn actually punching Nancy in the face, despite the fact that it'd be the least violent U-Turn's been towards Nancy in five weeks.
OLSEN TWIN ALERT! Mary-Kate finally shows up, after all the promotional hoo-hah, reading Bingo numbers at an old folks' home. Silas is there, too -- selling weed to some foul-mouthed old coot. While Mary-Kate makes with the standard drag-queen-worthy Bingo jokes ("your tumor is B9!"), Silas catches her giving him A Look.
Botwins'. Andy asks a mopey Shane to try some of the hors d'oeuvres he's cooked up for the party. "Is this dinner?" Shane pouts, like he's suddenly Winona Ryder in Mermaids (don't make out with Jake Ryan in the bell tower, Shane! Christina Ricci could drown!). He takes a bite and says, "This sucks." Andy: "How can it suck? It's wrapped in bacon." Shane says it's his situation that sucks. He hasn't been able to talk to Nancy in forever -- she's off doing drug dealerly things -- and he needs to convince her that sitting home all summer would be more beneficial than sitting in a classroom full of nutso Christian freaks who are "two clicks away from jihad." Perhaps a little something called knowing your enemy, Shane-o? Anyway, I think the point is that Shane is once again feeling neglected and cast aside due to his mom's hectic schedule being U-Turn's lily-white lapdog. Shane sulks off, leaving Andy alone to watch Discovery Channel footage of lions mating. After a quick, shifty-eyed look around the empty room, he unzips his pants. Jesus, Andy. I know it's probably been a while but...Jesus.