Weeds

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He Taught Me How To Drive By

Back at the U-Turn funeral, Nancy and Conrad approach Marvin about the status of their debt, and just as I feared, Marvin doesn't intend to let Nancy off the hook simply because she was nice to him. He's got a hardass reputation to establish, though you can tell it's all a lot of talk. Conrad presses him about the Mexicans shooting him in the ass, lying that U-Turn told him about it. Nancy gives him a side-eye for that one, but she's no match for the facial expressions of Heylia, eavesdropping from about four feet into the background. Marvin claims he's not afraid of the Mexicans, and he plans to bring Nancy to their upcoming summit, since they won't want to shoot a white lady. Nah, they have the utmost respect for white ladies, particularly the ones who shake their asses for them. Nancy says she won't be going to any gang summits, which is how we know she will.

Majestic summer Bible school. Shane is joined in his misery by Isabelle, who had to come here instead of summer camp because the divorce has left Dean light in the bank account. Paul F. Tompkins is still teaching the class with the same murder-mystery assignments he was two weeks ago, but this time Shane has caught wise. "This is a case of betrayal..." PFT begins. "Judas did it!" Shane blurts. Hee. PFT puts down his mystery envelope and tries something else. PFT: "This is the strange case of the maaaaaad scientist..." Shane: "Big Bang's a lie and dinosaurs lived during the same time as man." PFT yells at Shane and says if he's so damn smart, maybe he should be teaching the class. So Shane stands up and presents a mystery of his own: "The school that receives federal funding, yet promotes a religious curriculum in direct violation of church/state separation mandates." PFT tells Shane to sit down, as an impressed Isabelle utters "Jesus Christ." Shane: "Exactly." Holy crap, if these two ever really set out to combine their efforts, I'm honestly afraid of the havoc they could wreak.

Conrad and Nancy meet in her car, tension still thick in the air between them. He's still pissed at her for fucking up the Armenian deal, and she's still pissed at him for allowing her to become U-Turn's indentured bitch. He admits-without-admitting that he was behind Marvin getting shot, the better to ignite a gang war that would kill everyone else and leave Conrad and Nancy freed from their debt. He seriously tells her not to go to the meeting with the Mexicans. Nancy thaws a bit at being able to talk to her friend again and apologizes for knocking over Conrad's plants.

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