New credit sequence! Equals: a shot of the border crossing into Mexico, the words "Weeds" and "Created by Jenji Kohan" on green traffic signs. I guess I'm okay with taking a break from novelty versions of "Little Boxes." Not okay with? LACK OF CONRAD.
We open on Nancy, putting on lipstick and wearing a completely ridiculous cheesecake outfit-- a flouncy pink and black mini-dress. Is it me or is her "numbed by grief and pain" starting to shade into "slightly retarded?" She finds what she takes to be an ancient hair dryer and starts to dry her hair. Except vibrations don't really do the job. Don't do that kind of job, I mean. Which is to say that they do an entirely other kind of job, the kind you really don't want to think of Bubbie's needing done.
She makes her way to the hallway where Shane tells her Silas is watering his pot plants in the bathroom. They both bust in there to find Silas holding some shears and sporting a very becoming new haircut. "Becoming" -- I'm talking like a Bubbie who maybe needs a, ahem, job done. Nancy tells Silas to get the plants out of the house; "We don't shit where we eat. Or...eat where we shit. Either way. Words of wisdom." She's worried about Len -- who Shane tells her wants to be called Lenny. She leaves ("To buy a bed-skirt" she says), Shane wants to come, there's some to-do about Shane knowing what a bed-skirt is, and Shane tells Silas to "suck my dick." Nancy, ever the mature one, says, "You just told your brother to suck your dick. Gross."
Nancy, Andy, and Lenny in the kitchen. Lenny tells them he'll drop the subject of what they're running from if they give him three hundred dollars. Nancy does and he leaves. She turns to Andy and tells him she's doing something potentially illegal today. He looks at her dress and wonders what sort of illegal. She tells him she doesn't know, but it's for Guillermo, who Andy reminds her is a psychotic gangster. She tells him its work, and to keep his cell phone in case she needs him to get anything at the supermarket. "What like a rape kit?" Oh, that's dark. She leaves and he mumbles about her having a good day at "the office."
Prison. Celia's harried public defender tells her that the charges won't stick, giving her a moment of relief, before Celia realizes that the defender thinks she's a different woman with a different case (something about an Escalade being driven into a convenience store). She finally digs out Celia's files and tells her she's not going anywhere soon. Celia can't believe she poses more of a threat than Escalade lady, and the defender points out: "Anti-drug crusader caught with a grow house? You're fucked like a stray dog in Chinatown."