Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
Daredevil Girl Survives Fall

Andy tells Jill the reason for their visit, which is not so much a reason as the empty space around the lack of a reason, namely that "stuff" is "going on," and Jill incorporates this into her monologue, explaining that she is unable and uninclined to get involved in Nancy's "stuff," said "stuff" possibly encompassing anything from a massive shoe-shopping spree to a totaled car to an affair with a married guy, and that last one puts Andy's eyebrows up because it's close enough, so he starts lying about how she witnessed a Korean gang war in the parking lot of a golf superstore. It was the Choi Brothers against the Sun Hu clan, nunchuks escalating to Glocks, an old rivalry resulting from the fickleness of one Mitzi Sun Hu (trans. "Fragile Flower") who eventually made the jump to the other clan, and Jill sits down, because either this is really interesting and true, or really interesting because it is not true, and Andy turns on the charm, explaining that this isn't about Nancy or her "stuff" but really about Shane, keeping Shane safe from the Sun Hus, and the Chois, and she stares at him and notices that he's basically pretty hot and she makes the preliminary not-real step toward a decision in her mind and heads for a bottle of wine, probably the organic Rioja to start, in order to more fully commit to said decision, which is so in its infancy that we don't even really need to start talking about the general sketch or outline of what that decision will eventually be, but whatever it is, sometimes it takes a bottle or two of wine to get there, am I right ladies, yes I am.

Silas and Doug are hostages; Silas mourns his once-proud dream of working a plot of land in Mexico, in the Voltaire mode, and drinking legally. Doug protests that it is not his fault, but as usual it's entirely his fault. An outrageous hottie in fatigues, big as a redwood, arrives to menace them, and Doug claims to be a naturalist, a butterfly collector. As Silas backtracks and tries to explain they were just looking around, the forest hottie goes through their stuff and finds Silas's Tupperwares of pot; he's impressed. Silas gets proud, describing his botanic genius, and the hottie takes a knee.

"You know, usually in this situation... What's your name?" He puts a hand on Silas's knee and explains that normally he would shoot them and dumb them in the creek. "You and your Dad," he says, motioning toward Doug. Silas is quick to explain that his Dad is dead, and Doug tangles himself up in explanations that he's a friend, a family friend, nothing sexual going on no matter how often he mentions sexual things w/r/t Silas, that his Dad is also dead. Nothing about his poor gay cocksucking son. Hottie realizes that Doug is basically retarded, and tells his people to untie them. They aren't a threat. He orders Silas to thank him, and he does; he explains he's keeping their stuff, their weed, and asks them to leave before he is forced to shoot them in their heads after all. Silas makes haste, while Doug wanders around purely at random.

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