Dean and Doug sort of agree to team up against Celia, but first Doug wants Dean to dip his nuts in a steaming hot cup of coffee -- "flaccid in the acid," he warns after spotting Dean trying to get hard, and like... These guys and their dicks, seriously -- and the Great Balls Of Boba people once again hear the screaming of Dean and Doug and their dick obsession with each other.

Nancy hangs out on the counter while Esteban showers, asking why -- since he has the votes -- he doesn't just keep fighting. He might have the votes, he says, but Pilar has "an army." She tells him to just use the people like a blunt instrument -- something she knows a bit about -- and wag the dog, as we say in America. "In my country," he responds, "Dogs travel in packs." So essentially, Nancy grits, Pilar wins. Yes, but on the upside, now they can get married and eat Entenmann's and have fun, and he won't feel like he's endangering her family anymore.

Nancy puts it together: Esteban would run for governor on his own, if it weren't for their family. He protests, but she knows she's right. "You would win," she says, and he proudly agrees. "Then do it." They are adorable together, and she is proud: this is a woman she could be, and not feel like she was giving anything up. Take those six months without danger and put them on a national stage, and you have the perfect set up for both Nancy and Lacey to work together and achieve a life with him, and never let him go.

They're cuddling by the pool when Silas comes out and "respectfully" declines her offer of asylum. Esteban assures him it's not up for discussion, and Nancy explains that Esteban (meaning "we") has decided to run as an Independent. Silas offers to wear the campaign shirt, and Nancy refuses: one less son to worry about. "They're kids! You can take care of yourself," Me-Mom says, and Esteban assures him the boys will be fine just as Shane floats by in the pool, drunk and belching. Nancy's token attempt at parenting, today, is to yell for him to say "Excuse me," and he awesomely shouts back, "NO!"

Fine. So they tell Silas to leave before he announces his candidacy next week, and Silas starts to get mad. He thanks Nancy for being proactive for the first time in her entire life, but before he can finish that sentence she whines, "How is it that I have to beg an eighteen-year-old to travel around Europe with a wad of cash and my blessing?" Silas pulls up a chair and asks an even more apposite question, which is how it is that anyone could reasonably expect him to believe his brothers will be "fine."