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Release The Hounds

Previously, Peter died and Nancy found herself captivated by his ex-wife, Valerie. Also, Dean got himself a motorcycle, which is such a random thing from a whole season ago that you know it's going to mean something totally fucked up here, much like Andy's missing toes/foot-fucking from last week.

We pick up right where we left off, with Nancy's tit in a vise (literally -- though I'm tempted to use that as a saying much more often now) and Valerie asking her why the fuck she's been stalking her. Of all the uncomfortable conversations anyone's had while in the midst of a mammogram, this would probably rank in the top ten. So Val keeps demanding answers, and Nancy keeps whimpering, then looks concerned at her boob scans, but Val won't give her answers about that. Nancy offers to explain everything over coffee; she'll buy. It's worth noting that Nancy looks more helpless and pathetic right now than she ever did with U-Turn or Guillermo or any among of the parade of scary drug dealers who made her tapdance for them. Val finally realizes that she's not going to get rid of crazy stalker Nancy if she doesn't agree to this coffee date, so she says they can meet in an hour. Then she leaves the room, Nancy still tethered to the x-ray machine. It's something of a Desperate Housewives joke, the lady stuck in a mammogram machine with no place to go, but Mary-Louise Parker and Brooke Smith just aren't as haggy as the Wisteria Laners, so it's better.

While Nancy's looking pretty ridiculous in her current predicament, she's got nothing on Dean, who's sporting a mighty unconvincing handlebar mustache and happily cruising down some hillside highway or another on his bad-ass mid-life-crisis-cycle. He stops at a red light and finds himself surrounded by what appears to be a biker gang, the leader of whom nods at Dean approvingly, which is apparently an invitation to ride with them. Now, knowing this show, I was fully expecting this to end up with Dean being lured off for gay biker gang sex, thus blowing the lid off the roving gay biker orgy scene in southern California. But nope -- it's not sex but violence that fells Dean, as the bikers end up driving him off the road, and he disappears down a cliff. Things not looking so good for Dean.

Val meets up with Nancy, who tries to bond with her over iced coffees and their fatherless boys. Val's like, "I'm not here to chat like we're friends. I want to know if I should be getting a restraining order." Nancy does herself no favors by talking like a crazy person, but she at least recognizes that she's doing so. She finally gives up, saying it was nice meeting Val, "even though you are kind of a bitch," and she leaves her with the sketch she drew. Of Val's face. Val, rather than thanking God that this crazy face-sketching lady seems to be out of her life, suddenly seems intrigued. Oh, she and Nancy are perfect for each other!

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