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The Godmother

Meanwhile, from one impotent display of defiance to another, Celia has sat Isabelle and her makeout partner Peggy down for a talk. She tells Isabelle that she can't become a lesbian just to avoid losing weight. Sure, Rosie O'Donnell is one example, "but that is not where lesbianism is going, Isabelle. Look at The L Word." Hmm, legitimately funny line or groan-able intra-network marketing. I say it still comes out funny. Anyway, Isabelle says she and Peggy love each other. Celia points out that Peggy is a little Asian girl: "They look like boys already, you might as well go for the real deal." Peggy protests that she has boobs, but Celia disagrees and tells her to call her grandparents to come pick her up. Isabelle looks disappointed and says she new the new-and-improved Sweet Celia wouldn't last; now that she knows she's not going to die, she's back to her mean old ways. And, sure, it sucks for Isabelle, but it's great for the rest of us, am I right? Peggy, meanwhile, tells her grandparents to come pick her up because Celia hates immigrants. Hey! Just because that's probably true does not make it applicable here, you little hasbian. Wait, that comes later.

Back at the Botwins', Andy finds Nancy in the kitchen and hands her a pair of hedge-clippers. He asks her to cut off his toe, because that way he won't have to go through with his military service and also he felt this week's episode was a little light on the foreshadowing. Nancy actually looks like she might do it before Andy chickens out and decides his next recourse will be to move to Vermont, find a boyfriend, and get married. Andy, that should have been your plan regardless.

Nancy finds Silas in his room and hands him an iced tea. Which you would think would be a kind gesture from someone who's got every right to sell you to gypsies or Christian rehab or whatever, but it's Silas and he's sober now so he just acts like a giant snot about it. She repeats the "ice cream scoops out of your brain" line in regards to last night's E binge, but Silas remembers that one from last night. He's packing a bag for Megan's, which Nancy tells him is not happening, and she's prepared to lock him up inside his room until he gets some sense: "You don't fuck around with drugs." Silas grins like the Cheshire cat, because she's just given him the high ground and she doesn't even know it. He calls her a hypocrite, and Nancy does a decently credible job of no-selling that one and stressing that she doesn't take drugs. "Oh, you may not take 'em," Silas says, slowly, as he rounds on her like he's a James Bond villain or Doctor Claw or something, "but you sure do sell 'em." So you know that Mary-Louise Parker thing she does where she looks like someone just punched her in the stomach real hard? That. Right here. Silas says he's not an idiot -- he notices things. Nancy still can't speak, which lets Silas get cocky. He says rolling on E was "really, really fun," but it's not like he's a drug addict. Nancy: fumes. Silas tries to play it cool, saying he doesn't blame Nancy for dealing: "You're doing what you need to do. I guess." Yeah, not as detached as he'd like to be, with that "I guess." Nancy tries to assert some parental control, saying she's not going to give Silas carte blanche at sixteen, but Silas knows he has the upper hand. He knows her threats to kick him out are toothless because how would she explain that to Shane. He says they should just "stay out of each other's way" and be peaceful," and on that note, he's off to Megan's. It's interesting and a credit to the show and the performances that here, where Silas is at his most infuriating, is also where he's at his most understandable. Not that a hard Nancy back-hand wouldn't have been welcome.

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