Quick stop at the Colorado Amphitheatre for gas money: Shane and Silas will sell some hash, and Doug will stay in a tent and away from humans, while Andy and Nancy take the baby in for maintenance. Nancy tells Silas like eleven times that he's in charge today, sort of as a goodwill gesture but also because Shane's total insanity is now in play and part of all discussions. Luckily, they've happened upon "So Many Vibes" (heh), or what Shane terms the All-You-Can-Smoke Festival: "Phish, Dave Matthews, OAR, a Widespread Panic tribute band called Run Squirrel Run." More like the Hell Is A Place In Colorado Festival. But right then, they change the sign for the day: It's the Zoobie Woobies in concert.

Momentary hiccup, but then you remember that nothing is more horrible than children's entertainment. I mean, everybody loves Yo Gabba Gabba, because it's only incidentally for children, but as somebody who has lived through Wiggles Live I can tell you that it's a lot harder to make it through that shit when they're too far away to have weird sex fantasies about. I'm not trying to be creepy, I'm just saying close your eyes and think about Steve from Blue's Clues and count how long it takes. It's the same principle that says all Fox News anchors have to look like librarian cheerleaders: Your brain needs something, or somebody, to do while your body waits for the four o'clock Gilmore Girls rerun, i.e., I'm still not sure how I feel about Joe Scarborough's (he's on MSNBC, but go with me) politics but I'm pretty sure they're three hours' worth of sexy.

So you got some annoying kid screeching about the annoying bubble machine and the annoying kid's mom is dreading absolutely the entire thing, and she's like, "Gimme that shit?" Silas tells her to enjoy; across the lot, Silas is shaking down a dad and when the dad balks, Shane tells him to fuck off. Silas says this is the third time, so Shane's benched for a second. Shane complains that Silas is only in charge because he's older, and Silas is like, "Well, also because I'm more responsible and have better interpersonal skills." Like for example I don't solve my problems with croquet mallets, be they metaphoric or clunkingly concrete: "You freak people out."

Shane, still high on the whole Nancy-as-Mom/Nancy-as-Peer love-circle overlap, relates to Silas his epiphany that you don't actually have to do everything Nancy says. What he means is, there are no rules and no limits and it has very little to do with Nancy, and that's the unspoken thing he's answering, with the power of pragmatism: Fine, existential whosit, but then where does the gas money actually come from? "I don't care. I want to drink beer and eat stadium food. You're not my boss."