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Young (Fake) Americans

Spysteria Lane. Sergei walks up to the Spy House of Love and rings the doorbell. Syd answers the door wearing KimberBree's argyle sweater and pearls, and Sergei kisses her hello. Vaughn comes downstairs and he and Sergei are wearing the same blue polo shirt. It's not really as humorous as Sergei pretends it is, considering that their entire clothing supply probably comes from the SuperAmericaMart up the street. ["Vaughn's 'I just ate a bug' expression throughout this scene, however, is hilarious." -- Sars] They all head out. As they walk through the streets, Sergei tells Syd and Vaughn that they have a movie theater, a working gas station, and even a bowling alley. Syd's all, uh, why would the government need people to bowl? Sergei's all, to make us think that Nadia was trained here, of course! Actually, he just says something about how Soviet agents in the fifties were getting burned because they couldn't grasp the culture, so a bowling alley was created. Sergei then turns and offers the couple a gift of an engagement ring for Syd and a wedding ring for Vaughn. "I figured that might help with your…intimacy issues," snarks Sergei. Heh. Syd and Vaughn put on the rings.

Apple Store. Jack is in Marshall's Den of Geekiness. He opens up a steel box and hands Marshall a book. Marshall's all, aw! You shouldn't have! Jack's all, yeah, I didn't. Irina collected nineteenth-century literature and, when he was in Prague, Jack would stop by this small bookshop and buy her some first editions. "Oh," says Marshall, totally missing the point, "that's sweet." Jack ignores him and says, "The KGB encoded assassination orders in these pages." "Oh," says Marshall, "well, that's not as sweet." Heh. Jack goes on to say that the NSA deciphered all the codes in Irina's books but that now, Alexei, Irina's former resident chief, just asked for them back. "Which means there's something in here which the NSA overlooked," says Jack. "Find it." He walks off and leaves Marshall to his task.

Spysteria Lane. Sergei walks Syd and Vaughn into a fake used car dealership. This whole scene is relatively useless save for one sweet moment, so I'll do my best to brush past the useless shit and highlight the sweet stuff. Syd and Vaughn are tasked with buying a convertible. They'll be evaluated on tons of stuff while they pretend to buy the car. A fake salesman shows up and starts shilling every car but the convertible. Vaughn's all, uh, actually, Phil, we're here to buy a convertible. Phil's all, you sure about that? Because we only have one convertible, and it's a pretty fast car. "That's how we live, Phil," says Syd with no expression. "Fast." Hee.

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