We’re So Screwed (3): La Bomba

Episode Report Card
admin: A+ | 2 USERS: A+
"Love You." "...Love You, Too."

"Didn't Scorpius tell you?" she asks cruelly, petty and smirking, "A truce with the Scarrans is suicide." He's like, Girl, I know you did not just bring up Scorpius, and cuts his eyes at her. "Ah, so the men and women of this vessel must pay for your miscalculation with their lives?" She tells him it's for the greater good, and that they'll all be remembered as heroes. Which, any other PK, maybe, but Braca's not hearing it. He jerks his head at the Sergeant and then takes center stage, standing at attention, speaking loudly and clearly. "Commandant Grayza. Under Article Six Rulu, Uniform Code of Admiralty Conduct, Section Nineteen, due to a state of incapacitation of judgment displayed in multiple encounters under stress, I hereby invoke the Transfer of Command and relieve you of duty immediately." She giggles and turns to the Sergeant, calling him forward. "Weapons! Would you be so kind as to shoot this mutinous Captain dead where he stands?" She folds her arms and turns her back on them. I hate to see her go down like this, dude. Acting like a total asshat. Sergeant cocks his weapon and points it, of course, at Grayza: "Sorry, ma'am. Captain Braca has already relieved you of command." She goes dead inside; Braca nods. "Now, let's get this ship out of here."

The Rabrokator drills and drills; inside they spin and flop, and John admits he's never liked Disneyland. (Would have been funnier if he'd said Disneyworld, because of Florida.) Everybody yells and whines as they're jerked around all over the place; John calls out for his father at one point. Yeah. Aeryn's just like, "My head hurts." Scorpius sits on the floor holding Sikozu tenderly; Chiana laughs: "Let's go again!" The Rabrokator makes a loud noise and starts to move again, making everybody scream some more and grab hold for another round.

Staleek orders the head bitches that we're just going to disregard Ahkna's status as a Ruling Class Scarran, and also all her orders. They agree, because her track record is not awesome right now; I think this dressing-down of both Grayza and Ahkna so close together has more to do with Sikozu's deal and less with proving something about ladies in power. (Sorry, but ever since Martha went down that's the first place I go: Is there a man somewhere getting off on this? Do you want to live in a world where that's true? God forbid Oprah ever goes down that hard; the global asshole white-guy orgasm would knock continents apart.) "Besides myself," Staleek growls, "John Crichton is the single most important person on this base. AM I CLEAR?!" Have a petal, my darling. You're looking a little insane. "Apprehend him and bring him before me. Now." Suddenly, Emperor Staleek's knocked a-jumble from below as the drill gets close to the War Room. General Rahzaro grabs the Emperor by his pointy elbow and suggests that His Excellency get the fuck out. "It's the elevator," he explains somewhat unnecessarily, dragging him away from the table. Inside the elevator everybody flops around in everybody else's business, as outside, Vakali the Kalish gets tossed all crazy. Though sometimes they are robots with magic powers, on balance it seems that most Kalish, in this informal study we're conducting, do not have a particularly high amount of structural integrity. Rocks fly everywhere.

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