At her salon, Nancy blathers that Paul Newman and Robert Redford are the hottest blue-eyed bad boys in the whole world. She figures that if she'd been in the movie, she'd have nailed them both without a second of guilt. Then she smiles at her client, Sophia, and tells her not to listen. And then she describes Donner as a "mouthwatering hombre. "He's like a monument or something," she gushes. Eh? Sophia is equally startled and wishes Nancy would shut up and sex up her hair so that Luke can mess it up again while they grope in the back seat of his car. Which, by the way, is a Dodge Challenger, and not a Mustang. That's what I get for thinking I'm clever with cars. Sophia whips out a magazine so that Nancy can copy the hairdo inside.
Luke puts on his jacket and prepares to leave home, but Sherman stops him. "Must be rockin' out there," he jollies. Sherman is like Santa -- a walking bowlful of jelly. He whips out a hundred-dollar bill and waves it under Luke's nose, explaining that Willard thought he might want a little "walking-around money," which sounds to me like, "Son, buy yourself a big-boy blowjob." Luke is ashamed to have avoided dear old Dad, and peeks around into his sick room. A machine beeps bad health. Luke stares uncomfortably at Sherman and bolts, leaving the old man still holding the cash. "Guilt just doesn't work like it used to," Sherman laments.
A burly bodyguard named Clyde bellows, "Ruby, you have a visitor." Tyler oozes through the door with groceries and smiles at her. Ruby is being kept in a house on a hill, by the way, in case we haven't covered that yet. "I see you got your old job back," snarls Ruby. "Delivery boy." Tyler grins and says he thought she deserved a home-cooked meal -- a double rack of venison, slow-roasted and glazed with sour cherry sauce, a side of asparagus and bread pudding in whiskey sauce for dessert. Ruby doesn't care, though, and flounces off into her bedroom, petulantly slamming the door. Tyler isn't fazed, interpreting it as a door-slam of uncontrollable lust.
Hours later, Tyler plates the main course and drizzles cherry sauce on the top. Except the meal looks like old boot leather covered in baked beans. "Cherry sauce is an epiphany," Tyler sighs happily to perpetuate the illusion. Shouting through the locked bedroom door, Tyler tells Ruby not to reheat the asparagus, or else it'll turn into hemp. Right now, Woody Harrelson is cheering and trying to weave a tunic from lukewarm leftover veggies. As soon as Tyler leaves, Ruby brats out of the bedroom and invites Clyde to eat the meal, which would explain how frighteningly bony she looks.













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