When we return, they've brought John and Mark back in. China tells them they like both, but there can only be one winner. And it's John, so his book will be published by Penguin and sold nationwide. John's dad is a librarian, so he's overjoyed. They send them back to send the losers back out. Jaclyn's still teary-eyed when the three ladies line up. China tells them their work would put these classics out of print. They tell Jaclyn she started to work on something special but gave them a cliché. They tell Peregrine she should have given them something dark and sci-fi, but gave them a fairy tale. They tell Judith her piece failed as art and a book cover. Then they kick Judith out: "Your work of art didn't work for us." She says she wasn't able to adapt to the situation, but she thanks them. Only she doesn't mean it. They tell her they'll see her on the Lower East Side, and she says, "probably sweeping the sidewalk." She's sad to leave and didn't think this piece would send her home with Jaclyn's piece there. "I mean, please."

Next week: They are assigned to make their own shocking piece of art. Jaclyn gets naked with Ryan or something. Then Simon has shocking news for them. Jaclyn and Erik fight while waiting to go back and be either winners or losers (it looks like). Judges check stuff out and wonder if something in one of the pieces is a bag of shit. I'm taking next week off, and very sad not to get to write about the possible shitbag. I mean, how often does an opportunity like this come along? But you'll be in good hands, so stay tuned.

DeAnn, a writer and editor in Portland, Oregon,. You can contact her at twopmodmars@gmail.com.