WWF Smackdown
Giving Thanks For The WWF

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Latino Beat

It's a special Thanksgiving edition of Smackdown this week. During the opening credits, I see a shot of X-Pac and think about how much I haven't missed him while he's been out. The opening pyrotechnics seem to get bigger every week. Soon they're going to be lighting animals on fire or something.

Eddie Guerrero comes down to the ring. His Intercontinental Title will be on the line, but before the match can start, Eddie has a few things to say. He's addressing his opponent, Billy Gunn. Eddie's hair is, like, plastered down to his head. The camera finds some ten-year-old boy in the crowd with a big neon green piece of poster board on which he has written, "Shut Up!" in black marker. I think about sending him over to Sars's apartment to help out with her Dawson's Creek recaps. I think Eddie is drunk. Billy Gunn comes out -- looking pretty buff, it must be said. At some point, Billy Gunn develops the smallest cut ever on his forehead, like, don't kill yourself with the bleeding there, Billy. It looks like he picked a zit or something. Despite his non-profusely bleeding forehead, Billy manages to get the pin and become the new Intercontinental Champion.

Mick Foley is dressed up like a Pilgrim and Debra is dressed up like a -- well I would say "Native American," but really she's dressed like a stereotypical squaw, but a sexy one. Or, it's probably supposed to be sexy. JR comes in with the yellowest piece of chicken I've ever seen. Apparently, they're having a big Thanksgiving Dinner/promotional event for the new WWF cookbook.

After his match, Eddie Guerrero went backstage and kicked a garbage can and then knocked some stuff on the floor and yelled. I guess he's showing his "Latino Heat."

William Regal comes out in a suit, carrying his European Championship belt. He takes the microphone and starts ranting about Thanksgiving. First, according to him, it was started when some Pilgrims were kicked out of England. Now, it is license for Americans to unbutton their pants at the table and belch. Can I get a "hell, yeah"? Although those of us who plan ahead prefer to wear pants with a more forgiving waistline, such as elastic. At this point, the Rock comes out. He tells Regal, in a terrible faux-English accent, that he's going to "wallop [Regal's] candy bum all over Fort Lauderdale." Challenge extended by The Rock, and challenge foolishly accepted by Regal. They will meet up later on in the program.

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WWF Smackdown

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