Previously in the WWF: Stephanie caused Triple H to lose a chance at the WWF title when she got attacked by Chris Benoit and had to be saved. Triple H then turned his back and walked out on Stephanie, leaving her blubbering in the ring. Commissioner Foley told Stone Cold that his investigation couldn't interfere in any matches. Stone Cold promptly administered the Stunner to everyone in sight. Foley said he had to either fine or suspend Austin, but before Foley could announce his decision, Austin gave HIM the Stunner. Then he drank a lot of beers.
Mad props to my man, J-Dawg.
The Hardy Boyz enter the ring, accompanied by Lita. Did you know that the Hardys' mom died when they were very young, and they taught themselves to sew, and now they make their own costumes? Aw, they're so cute. I love me some Hardys, from the tops of their greasy hair right down to the bottom of their little spats. We see that on RAW, Lita and Jacqueline had a brawl all through the backstage area that culminated with Lita doing a moonsault off the hood of a tractor-trailer, and then getting sprayed by a fire extinguisher courtesy of Jacqueline. So, the Hardys and Lita will be taking on Lo-Down and Jacqueline. Lo-Down, for those of you who (like me) don't watch Sunday Night Heat, consists of D-Lo Brown and Chaz (formerly Headbanger Mosh). I haven't seen D-Lo in a while -- he's put on some weight, and not it a good way. He's working a bit of a gut, there. This is (as announcers Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler remind us about a million times) an intergender tag-team match, meaning anyone can fight anyone, regardless of gender. Man, look at D-Lo's love handles. Dude, put down the fork and push away from the table. At one point, Jeff Hardy tags in and executes a flip over the top rope. Can he just walk in like anyone else? Then, Jeff executes some sort of twisting moonsault-type move that was pretty freaking cool. When Lita finally gets her turn against Jacqueline, she totally botches a spear, and executes some lame-looking punches. Lita and the Hardys do a triple-DDT on Jacquie and D-Lo. Jeff Hardy immediately goes flying over the top rope and lands on top of Chaz outside the ring. D-Lo goes out to help Chaz, and Matt Hardy follows him. Lita takes advantage of being alone in the ring with Jacqueline and totally flubs a moonsault on Jacqueline. Like, Jacquie was really close to the turnbuckle, and Lita landed about halfway across the ring so that only her arms were touching Jacqueline. Good thing Smackdown is taped, huh? D-Lo runs into the ring (which is suspiciously empty of referees) and slams Lita to the mat, then throws Jacqueline on top of her. Now, of course, the ref reappears and counts the pin. Your winners -- Lo-Down and Jacqueline. After the match, Jeff goes to give D-Lo the Swanton Bomb but Chaz interferes, and then Lo-Down do their finishing move, appropriately named "The Low Down." Seriously, though -- D-Lo is jiggling all over the place.