WWF Smackdown
Screwjob

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Filler-mania

We start out, as usual, with a review of all that happened before. Well, not all. They don't start with the origins of the Earth or anything. Vince insulted his soon-to-be-ex-wife Linda, in front of his daughter Stephanie. Commissioner Foley came out and said no parent should talk to his or her child in that manner. Kurt Angle said that if he was Mick's wife, he would want a divorce. Mick makes fun of Kurt for wanting to be his wife, and makes a title defense match between Kurt and Vince. During that match, Kurt and Vince turned on Mick Foley. Mick fought back, pulling out Socko. Angle hit Foley with a chair. Edge and Christian came out and gave Mick the double chair shot. Stephanie ran out with some papers, saying that the board of directors had deemed Linda mentally incompetent, and full authority had been granted to Vince. Turns out that it was all an act, and Stephanie was in league with Vince all along. Foley gets a beating, and then Vince fires him. Huge swerve. HUGE!

Lawler is still stealing my jokes -- last week, I used the phrase, "You're A Mean One, Mr. Vince" in my recap, and Lawler just said, "He's the Vince that stole Christmas." Come on! Vince and Stephanie walk down to the ring. They both look extremely pleased with themselves. Before Vince can speak, an "Asshole" chant starts up. Vince says that he's "not a role model." What is up with Stephanie's hair? Looks like someone got a crimping iron as an early Christmas gift. Vince says he's not defending his recent actions (divorcing his wife, firing Foley), but they are okay for him to do, and that he couldn't have done it without Stephanie's help. Just not anyone else. Vince gives the mic to Steph, who says that she owes it all to her father, since he gave her "superior intellect" and taught her everything she knows, like how to find the weakness in people. Stephanie says that her mother always let her "heart and her feelings get in the way of her brain." Stephanie thinks Linda is not the right person to run the WWF, but Vince is. The crowd starts chanting, "Foley!" Stephanie thinks Vince is more of a role model than Foley, because Foley let Stone Cold drop Triple H from a forklift. According to Steph, Triple H was never medically cleared to participate in the Hell in A Cell match, and now he's in traction. Vince takes the mic back and wishes everyone a "Happy Holidays!" Vince and Stephanie leave the ring, and walk up the ramp hand-in-hand.

Outside, Vince sends Stephanie home to be with her husband. After her limo pulls away, Trish Stratus comes up to Vince and reminds him that she took a beating at the hands of Jackie on Monday. She thinks it would only be fair for Jackie to get a title match against Ivory tonight. Vince agrees, as Trish cozies up to him.

The Dudley Boyz take on Lo-Down. Ugh. Chazz and D-Lo are now wearing turbans. Tiger Ali Singh takes the mic and demands respect from the audience, and promises to beat the "inferior American athletes." Um, aren't D-Lo and Chaz American? Please let this match be over quickly. Unfortunately, it lasts longer than one minute. Finally, the Dudleyz get the 3D on Chazz, and win the match. D-Lo is looking puffier and puffier.

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WWF Smackdown

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