The judges talk about how they need someone who is both good-looking and has talent. Dylan Osborn, a 17-year-old student, comes out eye-fucking Demi, but doesn't have the voice. Ezekiel Carter, 19, complies with L.A.'s invitation to show them his six-pack, but you'd need a twelve-pack to listen to him sing. Same for a series of other singers and groups that are both eye-candy and ear-poison.

Apparently this goes on all through the commercials and the judges are increasingly frustrated with the lack of talent so far. So now here comes a guy named Jason Brock, who looks like the love child of Green Day and Psy, only gay. He's 34 years old and doing tech support, claiming to have sung to customers on the phone. I guess I'd rather hear a song than "Have you tried rebooting?" again. He swans confidently out onstage and the judges hate him on sight. Their "Oh, this guy" faces just slot automatically into place. He chats confidently with them and shares his whole idea for his Vegas show in excruciating detail, like he's already directing it. But then he goes into "New York State of Mind" and turns out to have this big old soulful voice after all, even though he insists on cheesing up every note so hard that I start thinking his hometown is Swiss Colony. The judges are so impressed by his style that you'd think they've never heard Jack Black sing, and L.A. even leads Demi and Britney in a standing ovation. Simon says he was preparing himself for the worst during Jason's pitch, but then saw himself at Jason's concert just as he described. Britney gushes, L.A. calls him flawless and says every songwriter would want a voice like that singing their songs, and Demi says she's in love with him. Obviously we're going to be seeing more of Jason Brock, after his four happy yeses from the judges. Jason leaves happy and the judges are happy to have "found one." Way to represent, Bay Area.