X Factor
Auditions #3

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M. Giant: B | Grade It Now!
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Simon Says

After we come back from the break and sit through a sepia-toned flashback to what happened all of three minutes ago, Tiah does pretty much the same thing she did the first time, only with "Don't Mean a Thing If it Ain't Got that Swing," complete with they key issues. Nicole and Paula seem unmoved, even as Simon literally begs them. He appeals to the audience, which seems to say yes. "That's why you have an audience," says Simon, who after all was willing to let himself be overruled by them last week. Nicole says she sees the steel in Tiah that Simon saw, but she needs to work on her vocals. With that, Nicole reluctantly blurts, "I'mgonnagiveyouachanceandsayyes." Simon takes it as a personal victory, while Paula stews in her impotent irrelevance. Backstage, Tiah kisses her fiancé for roughly forever, celebrates briefly in the White Box, and walks out saying she really wants to take voice lessons. Probably a good idea.

Afterwards, Simon and Paula are still arguing, until she tips over his snack bowl. I think they're made up now, because that's how they are.

Auditions wrap up tomorrow night. Looking forward to those being over. Or am I? Seriously, am I?

M. Giant is a Minneapolis-based writer with a wife, a son, and a number of cats that seems to have settled at around two. Learn waaaay too much about him at Velcrometer, follow him on Twitter, or just e-mail him at m.giant[at]gmail.com.

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