That leaves the five-girl Frankengroup Lylas, and at least Ally Brooke isn't wearing anything stupid on her head for once. They claim that they'd hang out together even if they weren't a group. Sure they would. In the pre-audition conference with the mentors, Simon builds them up with talk about them taking over the world, and then Marc knocks them down by saying, "If one messes up, you all go home." So no pressure. Dinah tearfully reminds us about how she's doing this for her family of 23. So if nothing else, she'll be fine sharing a bathroom with these other four. They come out and perch on stools to sing five separate solos rather than anything that could be honestly called a group number. Marc Anthony almost-but-not-quite stops himself from facepalming during the performance. At the end, they finally start harmonizing and alight from the stools to advance on the mentors, like they didn't realize they're supposed to be a group until now. After they're gone, Marc tells Simon he doesn't know what to think, then quickly agrees when Simon informs him they were "unbelievable." So Marc Anthony has finally figured out his role. Simon tells Marc that "there's one clearly great group here... this is going to be harder than I thought." Or at least that's what he wants us to think.
Finally, that evening, Simon and Marc sit outside to deliberate the groups, who in turn yammer about what it all means. But, as always, in a way that gives absolutely nothing away. The other two groups go tomorrow night, and next week I assume we find out who goes to the live shows. And we'll take our damn time about it, I have no doubt.
M. Giant is a Minneapolis-based writer with a wife, a son, and a number of cats that seems to have settled at around two. Learn waaaay too much about him at Velcrometer, follow him on Twitter, or just e-mail him at m.giant[at]gmail.com.