So we're starting late tonight because of a baseball rain delay. I'm used professional sports making me late to this job, but it usually happens with football on Sundays. Ah, here we are with the bombastic pre-credits sequence. I'm starting to think that the only singers who have a chance in this competition are the ones who can be remotely heard over the blasting opera music during this part of the show.
This is the episode where the judges-slash-mentors tell the people in their categories whether they get to be on the live shows or not. We're starting the week of news-breaking at Britney's house with the Teens -- Carly Rose Sonenclar, Reed Deming, Beatrice Miller, James Tanner, Arin Ray and Diamond White, only four of whom will get to proceed in the competition. Britney has risen to the sobriety of the occasion by having multicolored patches applied to the last few inches of her hair, like she's dragged it through a bowl of melted Skittles. The teens are back at their hotel, in most cases being encouraged by one of their parents. Nice that they got to come along. Later that morning, the top six teens hang out together in Britney's backyard and it looks like we're starting with Diamond White. We get the reintroduction montage in which we hear her initial audition ("This Is A Man's World") and her performance for Britney and will.i.am in this round ("Yeeaaa-aaaaaa-aaaaah", from what we hear), and how she shares a bed at home with her mom and that needs to stop. Diamond heads around the house to another part of the yard, this one on the edge of a cliff overlooking the ocean. That's where the teens will be having their audiences with Britney, who says Diamond was great, but needs to work on her nerves because she's through to the live shows.
It's Carly's turn next and she says that Britney only needs to say one word to make her really happy or one word to make her really upset. As if Britney's going to limit her comments to one word. Carly thinks she did well, but is worried that if she's not what Britney's looking for she might have to go back to eighth grade. Yeah, I think that might happen anyway. Sitting one-on-one with Britney, she hears that she has a great voice and control, but Britney says she needs the whole package and she doesn't know if Carly will be able to handle it, which I don't know how anyone can listen to that coming from Britney Spears of all people. Next we'll see Simon telling contestants to be nicer. But after making her wait for it while Britney twists her lips at her, Carly hears that she's through, and she gets to join Diamond White in Britney's winners' parlor just off the yard. What, your house doesn't have a winners' parlor?