X Factor
The Four-Chair Challenge Round #3

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B- | 5 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
Mulligan

Now it's time to actually meet Wild Thingz, and you know, when these two were dancing around on the stage at their first audition, they looked like douchebags. But now in their intro reel -- as they're sitting still and telling us that their stage names are "Vice" and "B.B." -- they look like mega-douchebags. They want to be the Jay-Z of L.A. or indeed the world. Simon declared them "incredibly annoying, but interesting" at their first audition, which was half right. Indeed, everything about them seems carefully calibrated for maximum irritation. They run around the stage (or in Vice's case, crawl) getting in everyone's face and just generally begging to be beaten shitless. Or maybe I'm just too old, because people who were actually there seemed to dig it somehow. Kelly tells them they're too much, but she means it in a good way. Paulina also really liked the performance. "I don't even know which one is the most annoying," Simon says, and calls it not music, but unintentional comedy. But he thinks a three-year-old might like them on mute. He asks them why he should keep them and the douchey white one talks about how this is all he ever wanted to do, and meeting the douchey brown one was like getting a superpower. Simon points to what he calls the normal part of his brain and the insane part of his brain, and he's going with the insane part. Which, of course, means Wild Thingz get a seat. This night just got a lot worse for Girls United, who are potentially going to have to spend the next hour-plus sitting next to them.

Glamour is the next group, a threesome of tween girls from Atlanta, who sang a harmony-heavy version of the national anthem at their first audition. Tonight they do a Motown-inflected version of "Cups," complete with Supremes-style microphone stands and choreography-lite. Alas, their harmonies aren't nearly as tight as they were the first time around. Kelly loves them and also wishes it was a bit tighter, but is also proud of them. Demi could tell how hard they worked, but isn't sure they're ready just yet. Simon doesn't disagree with Demi, but their first audition was so good that he's on the fence now. He makes everyone wait a while before sending them over to their new seat, based on their first audition. Which I'm not counting on them keeping.

The last act of the night is also the first Frankengroup: Restless Road. They're three young male country singers who auditioned as solo acts and got lumped into what they insist is a "man band.". We see Andrew, Zach and Colton riding horses, fishing and hanging out in shorts. Yeah, country fans will love that. But they actually do pretty decently with their performance, overcoming some shaky solo work with nice harmonies, at least in the first chorus. And when the deep-voiced one gets his solo, he makes Kelly just about lose her shit. She's on her feet by the end, and all four judges give them the first standing ovation of the night. So I think we can assume they'll get a seat. Kelly says this was a brilliant idea, Paulina loves them, Demi reluctantly admits that Simon was a genius for putting them together. And Simon says he was nervous when waiting for them to agree to be in the group, and he's really impressed. "Play the tension music," he says dutifully, even though everyone in the room knows Restless Road is getting a couch, and they aren't disappointed. So that's all four of his seats full, with six groups to go tomorrow. So there will either be some switches or it's going to be a very long, dull night. But on the other hand, why can't it be both?

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