The opening credits. They didn't show these last week. Oh, probably because they thought that we thought that Terri was a boy. Because they think we're dumb. Oh, the opening credits are: boat, pecs, boobs, shoulder, smirk, wet kids, jumping, smirk, wet kids, distant stare, pecs, grin, naked boys jumping off a boat, grin, tossing a football, distant stare, running in a group while holding hands with your sister, stubble grin that thinks "The 'Finn' is short for 'Fiennes.' Ralph Fiennes. We get confused all the time." ("Also like Finn from Great Expectations," Rose says. "Who's Finn?" I ask. "The lead." "No." "Yes." "No, he's name's "Pip." "Not in the movie." "NO." "Yeah." "NO." "Yes." "Ethan Hawke is the stupidest man alive." "I know. Ooh! Naked boys!") Half-naked boys running together, mostly naked boys grinning at each other as they run through a forest, laughing, thinking under a tree, rain, grabbing your sister's boobie as she flops into your lap, and of course, jumping into a lake with all of your clothes on. Oh, there's more. Jiggly running girl, wet boys, rowing. Forgot the dénouement. Sorry.
Say it with me: "Young Americans is brought to you by Coca-Cola."
Wet kids. The show is back on.
Scout and Will are walking through a deserted street. No one drives a car later than a 1978 model. I don't know. Scout is explaining to Will that he and Bella are just going to be friends and that's all cool because he really likes her "as a friend." Scout says, "'Sister' isn't socially acceptable. I already had that conversation with her father." I guess they're going to keep it a secret that they're related so that no one thinks it's creepy when they see them mugging down behind ye olde gas pumpe. Oh yeah, they're walking on Strawberry Lane. That is so gay. Scout makes a non-joke about just telling his dad that he met this girl and fell in love with her and, "Oh yeah. You're her father too! Heh, heh." Scout says, "It's so...Jerry Springer." But he says it like he really doesn't know who Jerry Springer is. Oh, right. The Townie. "And there she is."
We see Bella walk up to a car with some red rag hanging out of her back pocket so we stare at her ass instead of noticing that she never has one smudge of dirt or grime on her when she works with automobiles. Maybe they didn't have motor oil in cars from 1963. I don't know. Will says that he's got to get to work and walks off. Scout squints at Bella. Bella looks up at him with this emaciated pitiful squint. Scout smirks back. She wiggles a finger at him. Scout watches Will walk into a restaurant and wave goodbye. The camera stops at a "Help Wanted" sign all big and bold and flashing neon, with dancing girls in front singing the "If You Worked Here, You'd Be Sleeping With Your Sister By Now" song. Scout looks at Bella. Bella smiles and looks down. Scout continues smiling and looks back at the restaurant. Close-up on the giant, red Help Wanted sign. It comes to life and says, "Why, hello, Scout! I'm the town Help Wanted sign! If you listen to me, you can get a deeper understanding of Townie life, and learn something about the meaning of a dollar. Also, perhaps the Townies would think a little more of you if you were a part of their world, too. That and the view of Bella's ass from this window is fucking incredible. Seriously."