I don't usually attack TV ads (even the freaky Burger King ones), but ask.com started it with their whole "nagging questions" campaign. They've got random people going about their day staring vacantly into space with other people (who look nothing at all like them) hanging off of their shoulder asking random questions. It is supposed to be their inner monologue... or something like that, and then the gimmick is that they can find out all their answers at ask.com. Or not. When I was trying to find video footage of these spots... I had to go to Google to get it quickly. It might have been on ask.com somewhere, but it was probably buried. Or perhaps I didn't put in my terms in the form of the question. But since I'm not on Jeopardy!, I don't feel the need.

So while I did spend 45 minutes of my life watching this week's episode of Heroes (and it was actually kind of OK... surprisingly) I just discovered the two-minute recaps that NBC makes for their shows. This is hands down the best way I can think of to watch this show. It's all of the story and plot, most of the special effects with none of the Claire whining or Maya annoyingness! Given my recent disenchantment with the series, I think between this and our recaps, I may never need to watch this show again.

If I had read the news that CBS' relationship drama The Ex List had been suddenly yanked from the schedule (presumably for good... but people are afraid to use the word "canceled" lately) right after the premiere, I would have been bummed. However, that was before I watched the last few episodes and weecaped them. All of the charm of the pilot seemed to be slowly getting sucked out. It's no wonder the showrunner left. The optimism I felt about the show when I talked to star Elisabeth Reaser had slowly dissipated. Though that wouldn't have stopped me from watching it completely... I watch way crappier shows than this one for much longer than I should. Most normal people did stop though, so CBS opted to sub in NCIS reruns. Not a good sign.

Actually it only has two; I just wanted to make a Zwan joke. And in all fairness, Zwan probably didn't make much more than two videos, but I digress. MTV has launched a separate site just for their music video library, for those of us who are a) sick of wading through infinite fan mash-up tributes on Youtube every time we just want to watch the damn "Sledgehammer" video (which, for us, is pretty often), and b) are highbrow music video purists who don't want to be assaulted with the tween vomit that is MTV.com before rightfully making an afternoon of "Womanizer" on loop. One teensy complaint: There is no Eddie Money! Gah! Does anyone know what is up with that guy? MTV doesn't have his videos, and karaoke joints don't let you sing his songs. It's a mystery for the ages that I talk about far too much. Obsession is a dangerous thing.

Just when you thought that Speidi had replaced Trista and Ryan as the most opportunistic patently untalented pair of famewhores of the reality TV world, the former Bachelorette and her husband have come creeping back out of the woodwork like termites with the announcement that they've found a way to cash in on their upcoming second baby. They are stealing a page from the Tori Spelling playbook and working on a deal for a new reality show. For chrissake, I thought we were done hearing about these two, that they'd moved to some small town and were just living and working and being normal. I know it SEEMS like everyone has a reality show these days, but having a cameras trace your every move while you and your toddler son try to adjust to a new baby/sibling is NOT normal. It is the opposite or normal. It is abnormal and just plain wrong. Especially since they aren't remotely "real" celebrities and aren't having like seven kids or something, in which case it would be slightly better.

This poor show. It got shuffled all over the schedule this fall, and then wound up on Saturday nights where only the die hard fans (or fan, since it is possible that I was the only one who saw this one all the way through) were able to watch it. As I mentioned when this show premiered, it probably would have fared better on Discovery Channel or TLC or Spike, instead of NBC. But I'm not a TV programmer so what do I know? Not much since my early favorite Sandy came in third. She was the final girl though, and she did it with a smashed leg and a broken finger, which is pretty awesome. And I never expected Steven to make it to the final two, but after the first couple challenges, I did think that goofy dreadlocked Ben had what it took to win. So it is nice to be rightish about something... for a change.

So this past week's episode of Supernatural featured Dean getting a disease that seemed to only effect people who had jerk tendencies. I personally was so distracted by watching Jensen Ackles singing "Eye of the Tiger" multiple times (since it is kind of the best thing ever) that I couldn't concentrate on the whole Dick vs. Not a Dick controversy that's been a-brewing. Anyway, creator Eric Kripke (who is one of the nicest people on the planet... I swear) would like to set the record straight. He sent a message to fans (via the press) to clear up any confusion.

Saturday night marked the moment me and my loins had been waiting for: Jon Hamm's hosting gig on SNL! As expected, Hamm looked all manner of sexy-hot. And as expected, there were a goodly number of Mad Men references ... like in his opening monologue when he attempted to lasso in more viewers by explaining for those who didn't know that Mad Men was about ad execs in the 60s ... who dance! With the stars!

I dunno, Dwight do I have a better way? Well, there's always using the knife you already have to do whatever Andy (or Angela?) stabbing you have planned instead of whittling a makeshift knife with it out of a craggly piece of wood. Ahh yes, Mindy, that is the joke! Either way, "You're makin' a knife with a knife?" is officially my new "Cooonfeyuss!" Watch it after the jump and leave your knife-making tips in the comments.

The more seasons a reality show competition has, the more absurd and obscure the challenges of each season become. In an attempt to avoid repeating themselves, they lose all sense of perspective. America's Next Top Model is the quintessential example of this. By the tenth season (or cycle, or rotation, or whatever they call it), Tyra was dressing the contestants up in meat bikinis. Bikinis of meat. I've never laughed so hard as I did watching girls who barely eat get tricked out in pork-chop two-pieces.