BLOGS

The Telefile
4 Reasons Our Long National Nightmare Known as Tatiana Del Toro May Not Yet Be Over It might be a longshot, but if Idol has taught me anything over the past few weeks, it is never, ever underestimate Tatiana Del Toro. Last night scared the hell out of me, not just because she cleaned up the crazy and yet managed to come off even crazier than when she's overtly crazy, somehow, but also because she was really, really good. At singing. I mean, I knew she was alright at singing, but sweet jeebus, in comparison to the other performances she was like the second coming of Whitney or something. And while Dial Idol is optimistically trending that Danny Gokey and Alexis Grace will take the top guy and girl spots, with likely Anoop Desai (my favorite!) taking the third spot, I'm still refusing to get my hopes up, for the following reasons.

They didn't show "the laugh" last night.
They referenced it, they mocked it, they implored her to "Do it! Do it!" but she didn't do it, and they didn't show the infamous tape(s) of it. Which means that if you're one of those Idol fans who skips the audition episodes (a significant portion of the fanbase, I'd wager), or you're not a big blog reader, it is entirely possible you may not know about how fucking insane this girl is. As far as you're concerned, she's just a really good singer who got bullied around by Ryan and the judges for a few minutes. So yeah. She might not just have the good singer vote, but she may have the sympathy vote as well, and she didn't even beat America over the head with it like Danny Gokey did. This is not good.

The other girls were terrible.
Oh man. The new voting system insures at least one spot for a girl, and it was not a night for the ladies. Even my girl Stevie Wright (who I had FTW even!) sounded like the drunkest tone deaf karaoke I've heard since Angel and I butchered Wilson Phillips at last year's Bravo holiday party. No one's voting for Jackie Tohn, obviously, and she probably shouldn't have even been put through to begin with. Casey Carlson may be beautiful, but she peppered her Police massacre with pageant winking, and I love Ann Marie, but she's bland as hell. The only two girls whose performances were vote-worthy were Alexis and Tatiana, and Alexis is a little awkward, and she did that blue-eyed Aretha cover that we've seen a thousand times before -- could America be getting bored with that? I'm worried they might be. Especially after Tatiana's performance was exceptionally lovely, not to mention the last female one of the night and freshest in the voters' minds.

She's Vote for the Worst's priority number one.
And how long did they keep Sanjaya in business? Seemingly forever, kids. They're no joke, and they're rallying for her, big time.

Even if she doesn't make it through tonight, you know she'll be back as a "wild card".
Look, I don't really understand how this "wild card" business is all being decided, but you can bet dollars to donuts (I'm from the '20s) the AI producers will find a way to make it applicable to bringing this shitstorm of publicity and fervor back to freak us out some more, I don't care how all-American wholesome Michael Sarver is. He might wrastle oil rigs to the death for a living, but he can't top that kind of crazy. No one can!

Thoughts on Tatiana's odds or last night's travesty of an episode as a whole? Let it all out in the comments.

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

MOST RECENT POSTS

BLOG ARCHIVES

The Telefile

March 2014

25 ENTRIES

February 2014

24 ENTRIES

January 2014

43 ENTRIES

December 2013

15 ENTRIES

November 2013

28 ENTRIES

October 2013

40 ENTRIES

September 2013

37 ENTRIES

August 2013

16 ENTRIES

July 2013

15 ENTRIES

June 2013

26 ENTRIES

May 2013

38 ENTRIES

April 2013

43 ENTRIES

March 2013

35 ENTRIES

February 2013

58 ENTRIES

January 2013

62 ENTRIES

December 2012

48 ENTRIES

November 2012

60 ENTRIES

October 2012

71 ENTRIES

September 2012

67 ENTRIES

August 2012

66 ENTRIES

July 2012

51 ENTRIES

June 2012

60 ENTRIES

May 2012

70 ENTRIES

April 2012

73 ENTRIES

March 2012

72 ENTRIES

February 2012

64 ENTRIES

January 2012

80 ENTRIES

The Latest Activity On TwOP