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Bright Tights, Big City: How to Fix Smallville

In many ways, this season of Smallville has been a drastic improvement over what has come before. There were more superheroes, more supervillains, more comic-accurate storylines... but there were also awkward career changes, forced romances and the return of tired characters we had more or less written off for dead. With the show recently renewed for a ninth season, we thought it was time to look at what needed to change on the show in order to keep us watching. ...Of course, we're not making any promises, but it will be a hell of a lot more likely.

1. More Guest Stars
Not famous celebrity guest stars, mind you, although we'd love Michael McKean's Perry White to come back, since he's such an important part of Superman lore. Rather, DC Comics guest stars, meaning superheroes. The romantic stories on Smallville only go so far, and sometimes they even go backwards, but the last year's worth of great superhero movies has only made us hungrier for spandex. The appearances of Maxima, Doomsday, the Persuader, Toyman and the Legion of Superheroes so far this season have been a fanboy's dream come true, and even Oliver seems to be getting back into the Green Arrow costume more often after an extended plainclothes run. But beyond that, the remaining episodes of Season 8 look a little light in the tights. Fishnet-clad sorceress Zatanna will appear in one upcoming ep, and that's fantastic, but if they're gonna rely on Doomsday to carry the rest of the season, he better stand in the sunlight, because the heavily shadowed thing isn't doing it for us. And hopefully the rest of the Justice League will return soon? Either way, Season 9 needs a new superhero or supervillain in pretty much every episode in order for us to keep checking back.

2. More Flights, More Tights
Included in that desire for more superheroes is Superman himself. The producers may not think they can put Clark Kent in actual blue-and-red tights and make it work -- hell, there may be some kind of Warner Bros. decree that they don't, lest they kill the Superman film franchise in its infancy -- but at some point they need to give him a hero outfit and a secret identity outfit. Assuming he's going to start wearing dressier clothes to the Daily Planet offices (along with a pair of fake glasses), the hero costume can be anything, but please, please, please retire the red jacket. Tights may be a bit much, but I see no problem with Clark looking to Green Arrow, his only real superhero role model, for inspiration. Can you say red vinyl hoodie? Heck, he could always go the Superboy route, by simply wearing an S-shield T-shirt and a pair of blue pants. Perfect for a fight with Doomsday or a night on the town! The flying we're less hung up on, but c'mon -- the guy's gotta fly sometime. There's gotta be a way to show it that doesn't break the bank.

3. No More Lana and Lex
I'm assuming that the recent, totally unnecessary return of Lana Lang was meant to be her final send-off, even though we'd all pretty much forgotten about her already. But if that Kryptonite-flavored tease comes back on the show one more time, it is over. I'm walking. And if you need to bring Lex Luthor back, since he's the most famous Superman villain, don't hire a Michael Rosenbaum impersonator and cover him with injuries and breathing apparatus. It cheapens him. Either get Rosenbaum to show up and do the guest spot, or write a storyline where someone tries to bring a parallel-universe Lex Luthor into our world, and the one they get is 55 years old. (Or, you know, Jon Hamm.) An older actor, playing an older Lex with all of young Lex's memories, would be a suitable replacement in my book, because everyone knows that we get more evil as we get older, and the Lex of the comics has traditionally been older than Superman. Sorry, Rosenbaumers -- it has to be done.

4. Resolve This Whole Chloe Mess
Let me get this straight, show -- you've created Chloe, a character that everyone loves, but who has no place in the world of Superman. She was a brilliant journalist, but once you introduced Lois Lane to the show, you actually made her give up journalism, because that needs to be Lois's shtick. You actually had fans theorizing that Lois Lane would die, and that Chloe would assume her name, even though now that would mean that Clark Kent would be married to Jimmy Olsen's ex-wife. Hell, you even make fun of the whole controversy in an upcoming episode, when the two women switch bodies. You really, really, need to clear this up. We know that two characters die in the season finale -- if it's not one of these two women, please let it be me.

5. Change the Damn Name of the Show
This may be a chicken-or-the-egg question, show, but do you keep the characters as residents of Smallville because you want to keep the show name relevant, or because you can't afford to build any more Metropolis sets? Because the show should totally be called Metropolis, and unless you're trying to depict the realities of being a suburban commuter, it makes no sense to have Clark and Lois living on a farm in the sticks when they're both working at the Planet building. (Ditto Chloe continuing to live above the Talon, and Tess Mercer living in the Luthor mansion.) Granted, you probably can't change the name of the show, but could you at least repaint the Smallville sets and make them loft apartments in Metropolis or something? Or better yet, build another Metropolis city street to go with that one nighttime intersection you use all the time? That corner has seen a lot of action, and there should be cops on it 24-7 by now.

What would you like to see changed on the show? Do you even want another season?

TAGS:

32 Comments

March 11, 2009 12:24 PM
slashymoviereviews.com
Reply

To be honest, I couldn't be any less excited about even more comicverse characters on the show. I certainly wouldn't want a "new" one every episode. The reason I got into Smallville to begin with was that I didn't have to deal with all (and I mean "all") the villains/heros/friends from the comic books. I was happy to just see the relationships between a few core characters explored.

But Re: Chloe - WORD.

March 11, 2009 3:43 PM
Simon J
Reply

I actually have no problem with the show still being called Smallville. The show is an origin story so the title isnt just about the location but the theme as well. It still fits.

March 12, 2009 11:24 AM
HoneyBee
Reply

I haven't watch this show in years. It still on? Wow.

I guess 'Smallville' is Clark Kent's nickname, thus the name of the show.

March 12, 2009 12:10 PM
Faye Bond
Reply

The whole show is a mess. Trying to do a comic book tie-in all the time when there are major non-comic-book characters is asking for two kinds of fans to like it: me and slashymovereviews, versus y'all geeks. Pick one, people, because otherwise you are losing both.

March 12, 2009 12:13 PM
Molly
Reply

I just want this show to end. It has just sucked the life out of me, frankly. I love(d) Michael Rosenbaum and John Glover, and since they're gone and they've screwed Chloe's character until she's unrecognizable, I'm just over it!

March 12, 2009 3:13 PM
Korilian
Reply

Could we bring back Lana one more time and then spend an hour killing her gruesomely? That's the only ep I'd tune in for.

March 12, 2009 4:16 PM
Fat Elvis 007
Reply

I'll pass on the super guest stars and the suit--those are cheap gimmicks that won't do anything to make the show any better. And going by the introductions of Kara, Lois, and Jimmy, they are also boring and pointless.

Flight is a must. Clark has known he can fly since the second episode of the series, and not ONCE has he done anything about it. That makes him completely stupid and unrelatable.

Most importantly, we just need more continuity and a better sense of these characters' lives. The commuting thing is a good point--how does that work? We also don't even know how or why Clark got hired at the Daily Planet, which is just plain insulting. These things need to be explained.

March 12, 2009 5:14 PM
nidesola
Reply

I agree with all the points, because they need to move the show forward, instead of letting it stagnate.

March 12, 2009 5:14 PM
ladidah
Reply

I agree with all the points, because they need to move the show forward, instead of letting it stagnate.

March 12, 2009 5:52 PM
txgrrl
Reply

Mis-quoting the wrong superhero universe here, but seriously, "This show needs an enema."

March 12, 2009 5:52 PM
Rich
Reply

i would like to see Kara back sv really screwed her over bad, and i want to see Clark take flight even if it is a one time thing, more Lois Clark to.

March 12, 2009 7:33 PM
tam1Mi
Reply

There's a really great spinoff dying to be born out of SMALLVILLE featuring the Justice league. I say they use next season (which will hopefully be it's last) to set that up.

March 12, 2009 7:38 PM
ivy
Reply

CHLOE MESS I HATE!; season 5 Chloe I LOVE...nuff said

March 12, 2009 8:05 PM
MissL
Reply

Oh dear lord. They're bring it BACK?! Just let it die already it's awful. Nothing to save it....well unless they kill Lois and have Chloe take her name..then I might forgive...maybe

March 12, 2009 8:32 PM
Lisa
Reply

ITA about Chloe.

Please kill of "Lois Lane" and have Chloe take on the pen name. =)

March 12, 2009 9:57 PM
JaySin420
Reply

I stopped watching last season but gave it another try this season and its been really good and at times great.

I agree that the Lana and fake Lex stuff was terrible but most of this season has been strong. The Legion episode was fantastic and there doing a decent job with Doomsday, I'm glad its coming back for another season.

March 13, 2009 9:14 AM
visitor
Reply

7. Make Clark less stupid.
(He always forgets to use his powers when he needs them )

And are we really supposed to believe that everyone commutes from Smallville to Metropolis every day ?? How long a drive is that?? (not including people who run at super speed)

March 13, 2009 9:29 AM
wharcraff
Reply

I was hoping for a costume change a while back in the vain of Kon el. But with his relationship with Oliver I don't see it as a stretch for Queen Industries to develop a suit that has some sort of lead skin so he can fight crime unhindered. But that might be asking a bit much I guess.
Oh and bring in the Green Lantern Corp and the choosing of the first GL for earth. That could lead to a good story arc.

March 13, 2009 10:32 AM
Mekastic
Reply

Re: Chloe

So. Damn. True. Fans need the right kind of resolution when it comes to Chloe Sullivan. Who on God's green earth is she? In my book she's SV's Lois.

March 13, 2009 7:07 PM
WHAT THU?
Reply

dear god is right,why oh why must they keep this crappy show on the air.SV became a hit because it was something different and thats the only reason i start watching it.now it's becoming something that my parents/greandparents once went WOW over... NO THANKS

March 13, 2009 8:29 PM
Krissy
Reply

I agree with some of your suggestions.

I'd love more superhero guest stars. Apparently Clark needs all the help he can get. I do enjoy his relationship with Oliver Queen, I wish that was more of a focus then all of this Chloe/Jimmy/Davis and Tess stuff. I thought this show is supposed to be about Clark!

I also agree, no more Lex and Lana. It's redundant and regresses the characters. Let's see Intergang for the big bad next year.

I respectfully disagree with your generalization regarding Chloe. I like her, you're right she's not part of the Superman mythos but Smallville has given her a great place as Clark's best friend and Lois' cousin. But I find her story lacking. Her role as Clark Kent's brain does nothing to further her character or Clark's. I like Chloe but I don't love her. And just because people are bitter than she'll never turn into Lois Lane is ridiculous.

I personally love the addition of Lois Lane to the show. I loved the great cousin moments of season 4 and 5. I hate that two strong women are pitted against each other.

I do like the direction Smallville has gone this year. It's evolved and grown as the characters have - they aren't in high school anymore.

I'm looking forward to season 9.

March 14, 2009 12:56 AM
elleesttrois
Reply
replied to comment from HoneyBee

I haven't watch this show in years. It still on? Wow.

My thoughts exactly.

March 15, 2009 4:11 AM
Groupthinker
Reply

As much as all the "geeky" suggestions do appeal to me, I'd gladly settle for a Clark THAT ACTUALLY BEHAVES LIKE THE CHARACTER HE IS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!

Specifically, Clark needs about 50 more IQ points at least and he needs to stop acting like an impulsive whiny teenager led around by his hormones and start acting like a confident, mature adult who believes in what he is doing. He was heading that way until Lana showed up again.

And learn how to make decisions. Clark has two modes right now, make a decision after giving it about zero seconds of thought, or be trapped in an endless cycle of indecision . . . THEN make the same decision he would have made after zero seconds of thought.

March 15, 2009 4:35 AM
coalhouse
Reply

RE: Chloe becoming Lois.

There's another reason this needs to happen: Lois is one spectacularly bad writer. I freeze-framed the front-page story she wrote in this week's ep, and dear holy lord ... it is worse than bad. It has exclamation points, for Chrissakes (Cub reporter Clark Kent ... is actually an alien from the planet Krypton!"). I could go on, but I frankly figured the OMG and triple question marks and LOLZ must have just been off-screen, because that's the level of writing we're talking about here.

Please, Chloe, when you take over her body, either stay or leave behind your writing skills.

Which, come to think of it ... can they do a body-switching thing with Chloe and the writers for the show, too?

March 15, 2009 3:07 PM
Groupthinker
Reply
replied to comment from coalhouse

To be fair, Lois's strength was not so much her writing skills as it was her aggressive investigation skills. Even in the comics, the more grown up Lois is always having her spelling corrected.

I always imagined Lois got into this line of work because she likes poking around things and uncovering the truth and has only reluctantly learned writing skills over time and out of necessity.

Its kind of like Peter Parker. He started out with the skills of an amateur but it was tolerated because he was able to get pics of Spiderman "for some reason." His skills only developed with time.

March 15, 2009 3:36 PM
Miles Smoljo
Reply

I think the show's biggest conceptual hurdle at this stage is getting Clark into Superman's costume without falling back on D.C. Comics' conventional mass myopia that makes everyone in the Metropolis universe unable to see that Reporter Kent and the Man Of Steel share the exact same face (minus the glasses).

My non-canonical work-around for this problem would be to have the Fortress provide Clark with a final gift, something that I would characterize as the traditional soldier's uniform of the Kryptonian military forces. This uniform, being from Krypton (or at least being manufactured by the fortress from Kryptonian matter from the original crystal that came from Krypton), shares the same indestructibility under a yellow sun as Clark himself. The uniform would just happen to look like Superman's traditional costume (the mythos behind these Krypto soldier outfits would explain that a soldier's "house symbol" would traditionally be worn as a large crest on the front of the uniform, hence the "S" for Clark's House of El ancestry).

Moreover, this costume would have a sophisticated camoflague system that could be used to give Superman a different "public face" when wearing the uniform. That way people who know Clark could speak directly with Superman and not see any resemblence. From an optical standpoint, the change in Welling's appearance could be done with makeup (and he should probably use a different, more authoritative vocal inflection pattern while in costume).

Yes, this idea may seem heretical to comic-book traditionalists, but the notion of having Smallville's characters (outside of the Clark Kent big secret club) remain oblivious to the resemblance between Clark Kent and Superman because of a costume change, dropped forelock and removal of eyeware is farcical.

For what it's worth...

March 16, 2009 10:20 PM
Groupthinker
Reply

Oh and here's a thought! Cut it out with the obnoxious rapid fire metaphors. I've started muting Lois and Chloe's exchanges. Thats what we call critical mass.

March 20, 2009 4:01 PM
stoogeswoman
Reply

Nice try, but by totally wasting John Glover, Michael Rosenbaum, Anita O'Toole, et al, they've already "fixed" this show ... in the same way my vet "fixed" my cat.

March 20, 2009 4:13 PM
Groupthinker
Reply
replied to comment from stoogeswoman

Good thing Heroes is putting Glover to better use (and its not even one of that shows better twists.)

March 20, 2009 8:21 PM
Skyey
Reply

Im pretty tired of chloe before she was the friend secretly crushing on clark trying to find meteor freaks then she found out he was a meteor freak then she became one then she thought she was invincible and etc really i hope they kill chloe this season shes kinda boring me now she cant turn into anything else

March 21, 2009 12:23 AM
wwg23
Reply

The only way, imo, to fix this sad, pathetic Lois Lane is to have her die in the finale and have Chloe take the pen name "Lois Lane". Let's face it, Chloe is already Clark's best friend, confidante, goto gal, and partner. She's smart, tough, an excellent investigative journalist and has years (since before the Pilot) of experience uncovering the truth. Clark has nothing but praise for her. He sees her as the best of humanity and the smartest person he knows. She's his soulmate (regardless of her name).

March 21, 2009 3:39 PM
DinoMan
Reply

I've enjoyed the show for 7.5 seasons, thanks to a boyhood obsession with the character. For all of SV's flaws, it still represents Superman as an individual of muscle and heart. That's a hero in my book. And I'm cheering for the writers to move the stories in the "right" directions...
First, and most important, they've got to get glasses on Clark and tights on his alterego. That's a tough one because the show has created a universe in which outlandish costumes don't fit and too many people already know Clark without specs. Fixing those premises might take a paradigm shift as large as the Go-Back-In-Time ring that Clark destroyed a few episodes ago. [Maybe not the best idea, but it does preclude the writers using a cheap trick more than once.]
Second, they've got to get rid of Chloe. A shame. I do like the character, but she's in the way of the Clark-Lois relationship and she's unnecessarily encumbering the Jimmy Olsen character, too. I vote for a merciful, i.e. still alive, still smiling, goodbye from the storylines. And a Thank You to Allison Mack who's done so well all these years.
Third, get Lois back in the show. She's been hovering around the edge, batting her eyes at "Smallville" and, well, there's so much more she could be doing. The romance should only develop slowly while the crew - Olsen, Lane & Kent/Superman - battle the more than adequate villians the show has developed.
Fourth, Get Clark in the air!! Enough with the Running-Real-Fast stuff. It's a wonder he hasn't trampled someone!
Good things: I like the way the show takes itself seriously enough to keep from becoming the camp comedy of Lois & Clark or the Chris Reeve franchise. [Or worse, the George Reeves show of the 50's.] The comics were serious and worked; I'm surprised the writers of old didn't have similar faith in their material.
Michael Rosenbaum deserves a lot of credit for developing the best Lex Luthor I've seen. The writers deserve plenty, too. What a great angle, making Clark & Lex boyhood friends. I was sorry to see Michael leave the show, but it's true, Lex isn't the only villain in the Smallville universe & an occasional return is more than sufficient at this point. Lex the Bad Guy is fully established [unlike Clark the Good Guy] and we'll know what to expect when he does return. [Nobody really thinks he's dead, do they?]
More: I like the way Doomsday has been introduced, though the apocalypse his appearance wrought in the comics might be a bit much for a Superman not yet in uniform.
And Tom Welling does a more than servicable job as Clark. At this point, he's worn the personage longer that George, certainly more than Chris. It still looks good on him.
I wish this show the best for as long as they can keep from Jumping the Shark. [No, I don't think they have yet.] I'll watch Season 9. And I hope my vote helps move them in the above directions.

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