What constitutes news, you might ask? An awesome celeb hosting an awards show we've never watched? That's news. Two fallen 1980s movie stars being cast in TV shows? That's news. A TV show set in the 1970s getting dropped like a bad habit? That's news. A 1990s TV star being cast in a remake of a 1980s TV show, due to appear on TV in 2010? That's a math problem, but it's also news. All those decades and more on today's... TwoP News! (Cue American Idol theme music.)
We have no idea what the TV Land Awards are (they honor people who haven't been on TV for a looong time, apparently? And are a spoof of real awards shows? Or something?), but we're totally watching them, because Neil Patrick Harris will be hosting this year. Does this mean there will be a Doogie Howser, M.D. reunion? Max Casella has been popping up all over the place lately, and I always scream "Vinnie Delpino!" at the top of my lungs when he does.
Whether you hated the first episode of Late Night with Jimmy Fallon or kinda liked it, it still did gangbusters, scoring the best ratings in three years of Late Night, up 35% from Conan's average this season. It was also the highest-rated late-night show debut in seven years, beating Craig Ferguson and Jimmy Kimmel's debuts. Whether it will hold onto those ratings after this star-studded week of guests (DeNiro and Timberlake last night, Tina Fey tonight) or ride that long Space Train into the sun remains to be seen.
The Bachelor also did big numbers last night, scoring its biggest finale ever, with 15.5 million viewers watching as Jason proposed to one woman, then dumped her ahead of schedule and proposed to the runner-up at the reunion show. I mean, come on, he was going to break up with her eventually. They all do.
Is there life on Mars? No. No, there isn't. Life on Mars, ABC's time-travellin' remake of the British dramedy has been canceled. Apparently, an average viewership of 5.5 million just doesn't cut it anymore, and the show will get to finish its 17-episode inaugural season before handing its timeslot over to The Unusuals. So we're trading one ridiculous mustache (Michael Imperioli's) for another (Adam Goldberg's). However, if you absolutely need to know what happens next, BBC America will start airing Ashes to Ashes, the totally '80s sequel to the British Life on Mars, on Saturday.
Speaking of something being totally '80s, two '80s icons -- Jami Gertz and Jonathan Silverman -- are going to be coming to TV. Gertz (Lost Boys) will be joining Entourage (not 24, sadly) as the wife of the agent played by Gary Cole. ...Why didn't anyone tell me Gary Cole was on Entourage? I still wouldn't have watched it, but I would have written him a nice letter. Silverman (Caddyshack II) will be joining the cast of an as-yet-untitled sitcom about three couples facing the challenges of marriage and parenthood. Here's hoping Silverman gets in trouble with the wife for going away for a weekend at Bernie's with guest star Andrew McCarthy.
And the 1980s will meet the 1990s in ABC's remake of the 1983 television series V, where Party of Five's Scott Wolf will play a career-minded journalist who helps create propaganda for the alien "Visitors" who rule earth. Damn you, Scott Wolf, foe to humanity!
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