-- The funniest bit of the night was clearly the random comedians reading celebrity bios segment. Niecy Nash as Tori Spelling made my night, as did Fred Willard as Eminem, and Bruce Vilanch's "Han Job" Han Solo shirt. Meredith from The Office's Marcia Brady was a little community-theater audition, though, which was disappointing. And I still don't get Maria Bamford. Never have, never will.
-- Tori Spelling's Tina Fey-inspired "suck it, haters!" acceptance speech. Not the most original idea in the world, but it made me laugh and those haters had it coming.
-- Kelly Bensimon was so seated behind Bethenny -- seating chart zing! Color me vindicated.
-- The Real Housewives charity fashion show was hysterical. Like, I died. I love Bethenny, but homegirl is so doofy, and watching Vicki and Ramona try to work the catwalk had me rolling. Two things, though: Lisa Wu, on the other hand, can work the shit out of a runway, and how on earth did Alex have the self-awareness to know she'd only embarrass herself and opt out? Is this a new Alex???
-- The ripped-from-the-Oscars reality stars paying tribute to nominees part. All of it was painful, but most alarmingly, you guys, I think maybe Sanjaya can't read. And why wasn't Bret Michaels there???
-- Raphael Saadiq sounded good, but why was he there?
-- No Tom Colicchio? Rip city!
-- Chelsea Handler may have shown up, but she was practically asleep all night. Don't keep cutting to her if she's completely expressionless, producers.
-- Gretchen and Slade were seated together and Slade was giving her the possessive eyes all night, so I guess all the rumors about them being together are true. I just have to ask, is she stupid? Slade is the vilest human being on the planet. There's not enough liquor in the worrrrld, ladies.
-- Kathy as a host. I think Kathy's really funny in her I'm-just-tellin'-a-story-to-mah-buds standup format, but she's terrible in scripted skits and awards-show banter. Terrible. From the Roseanne fairy godmother opening, to the painful Malawi orphans bit, to the cringe-your-teeth-into-tiny-nubs-worthy vagina rejuvenation surgery and grossly making out with Aubrey O'Day gags -- all of it was just so bad. I love seeing Kathy because she talks so much crap about everybody and has no fear, but ugh. I need her to stop hosting things. It just doesn't play to her strengths.
Your favorite and most hated moments from the night? Share below!
Get Bravo's minute-by-minute recap here.
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