BLOGS
It's Fourth of July weekend! Rooftop parties, fireworks, and red, white and blue diabetes-inducing cocktails. Can't wait. And in line with the whole proud-to-be-American theme that will be beating all of us over the head non-stop for the next few days here in the States, I thought I'd expose some of our most beloved American television characters who are being played by non-Americans. It's like the fun version of the Commie witch-hunt from days of yore. And remember, they can't just be Australian and playing Australian or something, like, say, Jesse Spencer on House. They have to be pretending to be American to count. They also have to be currently on television, all you Anna Friel people. Happy Independence Day, America! There are aliens in disguise all over your TV! He's British, we all know it. He's a special case, though, because his American accent is so authentic I always think his real accent sounds fake when he goes on talk shows. He's also a special case because nobody else in the world could be House.
So many people on True Blood, I can't even believe it.
Apparently, actual citizens of Louisiana do not exist, because they've got a Canadian (Anna Paquin), a Brit (Stephen Moyer), and an Aussie (Ryan Kwanten) awesomely doing the worst Southern accents I've ever heard.
All those Bostonians on Fringe are perpetrating a fraud!
The show's star, Anna Torv, is Australian, as is John Noble, who plays eccentric scientist Walter Bishop. She tries pretty hard to mask her accent; he doesn't, for some reason.
Chuck Bass sounds British anyway, really.
He's British, and you've ruined his pants. Yes, Ed Westwick is a Red Coat too.
A couple of Mentalist people.
I don't watch The Mentalist despite what a massive hit it is, but I do know from Kitchen Confidential that Owain Yeoman is a Brit, and I know from his appearances on talk shows that Mr. Mentalist himself, Simon Baker, is Australian.
Yvonne Strahovski, Australian espionage mole.
Sarah from Chuck is Australian! We're doomed!
I don't even understand this lineage, but Sierra from Dollhouse counts as well.
Dichen Lachman, who plays the doll Sierra, is Australian via Nepal, which probably really impresses people in bars.
The Walkers go international.
You likely already know that Rachel Griffiths is Australian, but her Brothers & Sisters co-star Matthew Rhys (who plays Kevin) is Welsh. I know because about 80 percent of every season's gag reel is him forgetting his American accent in the middle of a dinner party brawl.
Dr. Owen Hunt: real American hero, Scottish person.
Not a real shocker, considering Grey's Anatomy's Kevin McKidd is the most Scottish-looking person ever, but sometimes the most Scottish-looking people ever are the ones you never expect to actually be Scottish, you know? No? Just me? Half the time they turn out to be from Denmark or something, I swear. Anyway, Kevin McKidd really is from Scotland.
Right, like the British know anything about law and order!
Just kidding, of course they do. I know we stole everything but the wigs and actually making people stand in the stand from their legal system. That doesn't change the fact that Executive A.D.A. Michael Cutter of Law & Order is from Manchester, England, England.
Well, the show is based on Hamlet.
Which wasn't set in England, but you know, Shakespeare. The point is Charlie Hunnam, who plays Jax on Sons of Anarchy is from Newcastle, England, which is a very good beer.
Seriously, what is with CBS procedurals and Australian people?
Both Anthony LaPaglia and Poppy Montgomery from Without a Trace are from the land of Hugh Jackman kangaroos. That's not a species, of course, but it should be. Walter should genetically engineer tap-dancing kangaroos with mutton chops on Fringe and name them that.
Your favorite American imposters? Let's get 'em in the comments!
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