Recently, MTV announced that it was producing a TV series called Hard Times about a well-endowed 15-year-old who uses his anatomical marvel to become more popular at high school. It sounds a lot like Hung, but without the whole selling-himself-for-sex aspect, and it's not really your conventional teen fare. There's a reason this isn't on the Disney Channel. However, it did get us thinking about some other shows that are geared towards grown-ups but that might be interesting/inappropriate if they were explored as teen dramas.
Set in the '60s at a suburban high school, teens from the local school paper would be tasked with selling advertisements in new and unique ways to local business. Long meaningful glances and moving speeches about life and products would punctuate each episode. And while teen audiences might not initially appreciate the retro-set series because there are no blackberries, they'll soon learn that they can use the show to study for their American History exams.
There's already a teen version of sorts in the works, and it is called Caprica. It's filled with teens running wild in virtual worlds (having orgies and engaging in ritual slaughter) and rebel against a polytheistic religious culture. However, we'd be up for a series that is set on a Battlestar; it could be sort of like Deep Space Nine, but with fewer trips to Quark's bar and more kids saying "frak" to tick off their parents.
Instead of a real trial, teens will be doing a mock trial. Naturally, there will be a bitchy adviser, who kills off Nintendogs and other assorted virtual pets in order to sway the votes to make her look good. Best part: doesn't matter if the lead teen starlet can't act her way out of a paper bag, because that's never been a problem for Damages.
We already have the light-weight Vampire Diaries coming soon, but it lacks the excitement of True Blood. So find a teenage telepath, have her work at a local diner where her boss sometimes turns into Teen Wolf and give her a bad-boy vampire boyfriend whom her parents don't approve of, and then make them sneak around a night. She turns to her sassy best friend and hangs out with her flamboyant bisexual pal. Kind of like My So-Called Life with sharper teeth.
There's only one Dexter, and he'd be kind of hard to replace, but this serial killer had some effed up teen years, and that's what we'd like to see. It would have to be less bloody and graphic to fit on The N or something, but he'd learn how to carefully hone his craft, and deal with awkward teenage situations. Dexter at the prom? That'd be awesome.
We can't even get into the whole human trafficking and whatnot because there is no way to make that more kid-friendly. Instead, we'll stick to the original focus of this show: dealing drugs. A gorgeous head cheerleader type makes a fortune selling her parents' prescription drugs in order to support her growing shoe collection.
One rich kid dating three hot girls who all agree to go out with him, knowing that he has other girlfriends. Think of the drama when it comes time for homecoming dances or movie night.
Walt White is the most popular teacher in the school, the reason being that this chemistry teacher takes his AP students on extra curricular field trips and teaches them how science can have a marketable real-world application. Think Head of the Class, but with more meth.
This one is tough, but it would basically have to be done 21 Jump Street style, with rookie cops posing as hall monitors in an attempt to break up a seedy underground cell phone ring that specializes in phones that can text without teachers catching on. We can't wait for the season where they take down some illicit scandal involving the school paper.
The '70s Show, but with more of a "free love" vibe happening. First-base limit key parties for everyone!
Like Growing Up Gotti, but a scripted version, with a quality writer behind the whole thing. The focus would be on the teens trying to decide if they want to go into the "family business" when they grow up. We wouldn't be surprised if Teresa from The Real Housewives of New Jersey tries to get her daughter a part.
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