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TWoP 10: Biggest Reality TV Famewhores

by Angel Cohn January 29, 2010 6:08 AM
TWoP 10: Biggest Reality TV Famewhores

Recently, Daniel Franco, who already had two chances at Project Runway (two too many, if you ask us) got another shot at reality TV by appearing as the self-described lovechild of Susan Boyle and Adam Lambert on American Idol. Really, some people just don't know when to quit. However, he did inspire us to look back at the desperate, pathetic famewhores who make his two brief runs at reality TV look practically lazy by comparison.

10. Tila Tequila
The bisexual star didn't exactly get her notoriety from reality shows per se, but gaining attention for being a MySpace personality is practically the same thing. She then increased her presence in the world by landing her own reality dating show, A Shot at Love, where she looked for the right man or woman for two seasons. Since then, she hasn't done another show, but she's continued using the internet (and the tabloids) to extend her 15 minutes with lots of salacious, and sometimes tragic, stories.

9. Dave Amerman
You might not recognize the name because he's better known to the world as 12 Pack, a nickname that he got from New York (not the city) on I Love New York after he showed off his toned stomach muscles. He didn't find love there, so he went after cold-hard cash on I Love Money and then tried again to find love (or more likely fame) on Daisy of Love, where he did everything, including donning a Speedo, in order to stay on TV

8. Dr. Will Kirby
Most true famewhoring reality stars go on TV because they have no discernible skills, but that's not the case at all with Dr. Will. He's a licensed medical professional who practices the lucrative specialty of dermatology. He took some time off to spend a summer being devilishly manipulative in the Big Brother house and then again for Big Brother: All Stars. Out of the deal he got a gig on the docudrama Dr. 90210 and met his friend-turned-business partner Mike "Boogie" Malin (who is another famewhore, albeit less educated than Dr. Will) and they both appeared on the competition show Battle of the Network Reality Stars. Who knows where he'll show his mug again, but it will likely be a stunt to further promote a business venture or his practice.

7. Theo Von
Theo Vonkurnatowski, who joined the cast of Road Rules and then shortened his name, did Real World/Road Rules Challenge for a few seasons and Battle of the Network Reality Stars before he tried his hand at stand-up comedy by auditioning for Last Comic Standing. He was relegated to a web tie-in series, which is only a slight step up from Daniel Franco's Idol audition. He also participated in the cheesy comedic parody show Reality Bites Back. When will these reality stars learn not to bite the hand that feeds them?

6. Trishelle Cannatella
Reportedly, Trishelle was originally auditioning for another reality show when she was plucked to be on The Real World: Las Vegas. For a hot blonde with a desire to be famous at all costs, she certainly made the most of her RW stint by participating in a three-way in a hot tub, which has since become become practically legendary. Since then she's done the obligatory stints on Real World/Road Rules challenge and also participated in Fear Factor, The Surreal Life, Kill Reality (a series about making a horror reality parody), Hulk Hogan's Celebrity Championship Wrestling and in the always classy Lingerie Bowl.

5. Jon "Jonny Fairplay" Dalton
While we're still quite shocked that this notorious Survivor pathological liar didn't make it on to the forthcoming Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains, he's really had more than his fair share of reality appearances. In fact, after his lie about his grandma dying on Survivor, he did the All Stars season, Celebrity Bull Riding Challenge, Fear Factor, Kill Reality and even went into professional wrestling for a bit to stay in the spotlight. Topping all that, he procreated with yet another reality star (Michelle from Season 4 Top Model), possibly creating an entire new generation of reality TV wannabes.

4. Megan Hauserman
What's a Playboy model to do when she's attractive, has fake ginormous boobs and can't get a job on The Girls Next Door? Go on Beauty and the Geek and show off her lack of education, for starters. Then desperately try and date Bret Michaels, until he figures out she's more interested in the cameras than him. Then take her little pocket-sized dog and go on I Love Money and Charm School and be so horrible that VH1 grants her a self-titled series, Megan Wants a Millionaire. Things didn't turn out so well with that last gig, though, so hopefully that means we're free of Megan... at least for a while.

3. Omarosa
Another one of reality TV's worst people, she took The Apprentice from a show about business to a show about backstabbing, screaming and complaining. To her credit (we suppose), this landed her a return appearance on Celebrity Apprentice, a spot on The Surreal Life and a gig on Battle of the Network Stars, not to mention the added attention she gets from just saying ridiculous things to the media whenever she's given the opportunity. To make matters worse, there are rumors that Trump is trying to help her get her own dating show. Just what the world doesn't need.

2. Speidi
Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag may have only had time in their very busy lives to appear on The Hills and I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here (and Heidi did a handful of small appearances on Laguna Beach), but to us, it feels like they've been inescapable. They do many desperate things in order to get more reality screen time, like staging fake weddings, trying to launch a music career and indulging in extreme plastic surgery. It seems highly unlikely that these two will ever do anything that doesn't involve the tabloids and reality television in some way, shape or form, which means we may be stuck with them for years to come.

1. Rob Mariano
Boston Rob was an aggressive Survivor player, and we thought (hoped) he had fallen off the planet after his first season on the show, but then he made a comeback with Survivor: All-Stars. That's where he met his fellow partner in reality crime Amber, and together they earned an annoying nickname (Romber), had their proposal and wedding televised, competed in The Amazing Race and starred in a show about him trying to become a professional poker player (Rob & Amber: Against the Odds). Now he's back in Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains for yet another shot at reality TV glory, but, thankfully, his wife is not participating this time.

Honorable Mentions:
Even though she's been out of the limelight for a bit, Adrianne Curry deserves some sort of lifetime achievement award for not only parlaying her Top Model win into a Surreal Life stint, but also for snagging herself a Brady kid and another reality gig out of the deal.

Also, Stephen Baldwin is probably one of the biggest reality famewhores on the planet, but we left him off the list because he mostly got his start outside the genre by acting in some (somewhat) credible scripted films. But since then, he's done Celebrity Big Brother UK , I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out Here, Celebrity Apprentice, Celebrity Bull Riding, The Mole and Fear Factor. So if you've got a new reality show and need a celeb, call him. He's unlikely to turn you down.

19 Comments

January 29, 2010 10:34 AM
Twilight Man
Reply

Carnie Wilson

Once again, like Stephen, she too has some credibility. But once her singing career fizzled. She's been on TV non-stop. Her most ridiculous appearances include:

Celebracadabra
Outsiders' Inn
Celebrity Ghost Stories
and her most recent atrocity to man... Carnie Wilson: Unstapled, a candid reality show.
Now we can follow her around 24/7. Oh Joy?!?

January 29, 2010 2:38 PM
me
Reply

Correction: Jon Dalton was on "Fans" Vs. "Favorites" and not All-Stars. But he's still a major famewhore douche.

January 29, 2010 3:35 PM
Kelly
Reply

Rob and Amber? Ugh. They so want to be relevant and Rob so wants to NOT get a real job. They're the trashy kids who thinks money buys class.

"Boogie" is another I could go without having to see ever again. What a mudface. He only became "cool" once he aligned himself with Dr. Will. And Dr. Will was only "cool" because he didn't give a shit.

Speidi? Not even worth mentioning. But I actually like Adrianne Curry. That crazy monotone voice and that adorable hubby? That makes for fun telly.
The ugly Kardashian sister (Klhoe) is a premium famewhore but I don't expect that to last. She's not hot, smart or interesting enough to sustain any real "fame". She needs props (i.e. a corny, family based reality show), a hot sister or an athlete hubby to be deemed worthy of all this attention.

January 29, 2010 7:34 PM
Grace
Reply

I feel like Dr Will should get some sort of gold star on this list. The rest are famewhores for famewhoring's sake. Dr Will, on the other hand, has morphed it into some sort of showcase/networking tool.

Also, he's pretty much the only one who would react to the pronouncement "You will never be on television again -- ever!!" with a shrug. And then he'd figure out how to market dermatology as live theatre or something.

January 29, 2010 8:01 PM
Miranda
Reply

I'm sorry to admit it, but I actually liked Rob and Amber when they were on "The Amazing Race." They played smart, and I thought they were pretty likable. I haven't watched anything they have done since "TAR All-Stars," though.

January 29, 2010 10:55 PM
KateNonymous
Reply

Why not Amber? Boston Rob never wins anything.

January 29, 2010 11:29 PM
Hannah
Reply

I knew Dr. Will would be on this list which is appropriate but I can't help but love him due to the fact that he's entertaining as hell and compared to everyone on this list I actually enjoy watching him manipulate and screw with everyone's head in Big Brother. Plus, I love how he just really didn't give a damn and didn't take anything too seriously.

Mike "Boogie" on the other hand can just disappear. Compared to Will he's not charming, entertaining or smart and I don't even want to talk about Speidi or Tila Tequila.

January 30, 2010 2:23 PM
Melissa
Reply

What about Jon and Kate?? Not the long list of shows, but surely peddling your children/crumbling marriage for coin has gotta be worth something

January 30, 2010 2:35 PM
Pam
Reply
replied to comment from Kelly

You should have seen Adrienne and her husband (can't remember his name) on the Newlywed Game. It was so funny!

January 30, 2010 5:04 PM
Kristina
Reply

You forgot to mention that Rob and Amber were on The Amazing Race twice -- they were also on the All Star season.

January 30, 2010 6:01 PM
joyo
Reply

Didn't know Rob would be on "Heroes vs Villains". Not sure I can watch that. Is it too much to hope the other villains will get rid of him quickly? Nah. They'll be too stupid.

January 30, 2010 6:17 PM
Katt
Reply

What about that dude from the Bachelor, the dr. one, not Andy, the other one, who now stars on The Doctors or some such? That's enough for me, he was a dick on the show. Travis? The one with Moana (love the name) and Sarah. From TN. God, I am a fountain of useless info. That watches too much tv.

January 30, 2010 6:19 PM
snippee
Reply

I feel like Speidi learned everything they know about reality show famewhoring from Trista Sutter. God, how i loathe her.

January 31, 2010 1:22 AM
Amanda
Reply

What about the Kardashians? I'm sick and tired of them! They do not deserve to be famous and they have no talent whatsoever.

March 5, 2010 9:56 AM
Stephanie
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Kate Gosselin, anyone? Her claim to fame, so far, is having a litter of kids and getting a very public divorce. Now she is going to be on DWTS, despite not having any talent or athletic ability. I have no doubt there will be another reality show of some sort after that-anything to keep her away from the kids who made her famous.

March 5, 2010 2:02 PM
Matt
Reply

SLADE SMILEY of Bravo's "Real Housewives..." fame!!!

He dumped his first housewife, Jo, on TV (on a therapist's couch, no less), and dated Laurie while he and Jo were "on a break". His and Jo's breakup resulted in the gawdawful show "Jo and Slade: Date My Ex" which...uncomfortable.

NOW he's moved on housewife #3 - gold digging, blissfully airheaded Gretchen. Seriously this dude will do anything to keep the housewife train going.

June 23, 2010 10:12 PM
Elvis
Reply

what about Brody Jenner he and his useless brother are constantly on the Kardashians and Laguna beach and the hills and they had a short lived show of their own god why do i have to work every day and these douche bags get to hang out with hot girls get laid and not work.

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