Seriously, after my anger toward the abomination that was Liz, I wanted to give RJ Berger a fighting chance, so even after watching -- and absolutely hating -- the pilot, I sat through the second episode. I guess that as a lover of comedy, I so badly hoped that this series would, in part, start a movement to resurrect MTV's former tradition of lowbrow-but-fun scripted series like Beavis and Butthead and 2ge+her. But after giving this show two whole chances, I think it's safe to say that the revolution will not be televised.

In the pilot, we met RJ, a nerdy 15-year-old sophomore in high school. He's MTV's version of a loser (a smart guy with glasses), and in love with the most popular girl in school, Jenny Swanson, the only character on the show who isn't foul-mouthed or severely horny. Jenny has a boyfriend named Max who is (take a guess!) a dumb jock. RJ's best friend is Miles, a 31-year-old actor trying to pass as a nerdy hormonal teenager. And then there's Lily, Miles and RJ's crude friend who they hate because she's TV-ugly and wants to have sex with RJ. Also, RJ's parents are perverted swingers. Can they possibly pack more sex into this show?

After a series of events that don't make any sense and that I don't feel like explaining, everyone in school sees RJ's enormous penis, and all of a sudden he's invited to the hottest party in town. Miles is excited and plans to use RJ's endowment to get them to be popular (what?), but RJ thinks his penis size is a curse because last summer, a stereotypical female Asian character tried to go down on him but almost choked to death during the act. After some convincing, RJ goes to the party where Max punches him in the face for speaking one word to Jenny. To retaliate, RJ puts his hand down his pants and then rubs it in Max's face. Oh, and Miles tries date-raping a passed-out drunk girl in a hot tub. Good.

In the second episode, RJ runs for class president and loses. His penis is only mentioned once.

I will say that I theoretically like the way the show uses mixed media, since RJ has an interest in animation. I'm assuming that each episode will have some unique form of media to tell a little bit of the story, as the pilot used a minute or two of manga and the second episode contained computer animation. While the transitions are slightly awkward, there's definitely a level of creativity to that concept.

But God, the show is terrible. The premise doesn't go further than "RJ has a big dick," with the characters and jokes being completely one-dimensional. It was that kind of reason that I wanted to give the show another chance, because maybe the writers just got really excited about having such an "outrageous" hook. But in the second episode when RJ's penis isn't even mentioned, we can quickly see how weak, overdone and sloppy the foundation of the series is. I'm not so sure the writers know what to do from this point, especially after learning that the show was originally supposed to be a movie, which requires way less character building and premise than a television series does. So now, it's basically 30-minute installments of raunchy jokes and grotesque characters. Do the writers not realize that we've all already seen too many stories about how bogus high school is? And have they never interacted with teenagers? As it stands now, this is nowhere close to actual human dialogue.

To make matters worse, MTV has slapped this smut with a TV-14 label, officially giving up in the Not Trying To Confuse Kids About Sex Even More department. Not that anyone's surprised. Is this the worst show MTV has had on in recent months? I think so. Say all you want about Jersey Shore, but at least the drinking and screwing on that show is between people who are of legal age, rather than characters who are supposed to be 15 and 16. Also, the manufactured drama on Jersey Shore is actually entertaining.

What did you think about The Hard times of R.J. Berger? Your comments must contain a sexy pun. And if you're looking for some quality television, check out our review of Warren the Ape!

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