Under contractual obligation to CBS, Paula Abdul cannot return to American Idol during her stint on Got To Dance at risk of being sued by the network. No Paula on Idol for at least five years? Cue the sighs of relief heard 'round the world.

Rosie O'Donnell will be hosting her own talk show on Oprah's fledgling cable network, OWN, launching in January 2011. Oprah said it's because O'Donnell brings her "authentic voice, dynamic energy and pure passion to everything she does." Translation: She's brash, abrasive and bound to say something that will incite viewers to tune in for a slice of the spectacle.

If Jon and Kate were nothing else (besides horrible parents), they were an undeniable boon to the network that spawned them. Now, TLC is continuing on its anxious quest to edginess by premiering a reality show about a polygamist in Utah looking for a fourth wife to add to his household, called Sister Wives. That title sounds oddly incestuous, by the way; might I suggest Wild Wild West: Big Pimpin' or I Still Need Someone To Walk The Dog as more straightforward substitutes?

When he's not busy impersonating Obama's pregnant pauses in speech, Fred Armisen from Saturday Night Live apparently writes TV comedies on the side. IFC has greenlit production for Portlandia, a series Armisen created about the "people and values" of Portland, Oregon. Can one of the characters be black and make a historic and far-reaching bid for town mayor? Just sayin'.

Laura Bell Bundy, who portrayed Elle Woods on the Broadway version of Legally Blonde, joins the next season of How I Met Your Mother as Robin's new co-host. At this point, I'm game for anyone who will possibly move this stagnant plot forward. And now with a blonde joining the familiar redhead and brunette, the female cast officially represents all hair colors. Diversity! And inconsequential observations! It's a Friday, y'all.

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