Brace yourselves -- even though the Rockford Files remake has been shelved, the Charlie's Angels reboot is all systems go for ABC. It'll be set in Miami (bikinis!), written by the Smallville producers (soap-opera romance!) and possibly directed by a Gossip Girl director (high fashion!). Also on ABC's slate: a show about a dancer family, and a show about a pair of lady detectives. Wait, more lady detectives? So, five total? You're reaching critical mass, ABC.

Just when we thought we couldn't get more excited about the new Torchwood, Lauren Ambrose has joined the cast for seven episodes. Put us six feet under with Ianto -- we're finished.

For some reason, Dana Carvey will host Saturday Night Live with musical guest Linkin Park. Is it a special '90s edition? (Yes, I know the first LP album hit in 2000. Still, Linkin who?) A subsequent episode will be hosted by Jesse Eisenberg, with musical guest Nicki Minaj. Yay, relevance!

Californication? Renewed. Donald Trump's Ultimate Merger? Also renewed, although we have no idea what it is. An Omarosa dating show? Except now with less Omarosa?

The new host of Top Chef Masters is Australian chef Curtis Stone. I hope a contestant can somehow trick him into saying "That's not a knife! This is a knife!" ...Australians like Crocodile Dundee, right?

Dancing With the Stars wants Lorenzo Lamas. Bur doesn't everybody, really? The man's a renegade!

Harry's Law star Kathy Bates will return to The Office later this season, probably to ease the transition, as Steve Carell will reportedly leave the show before the season's end. Looks like we'll meet his replacement sooner than we thought.

Also returning to his last show: Event star Jason Ritter will come back to Parenthood. Just in time for Sarah to swear off dating!

Meanwhile, Amber Tamblyn will be leaving House. After her too-brief stint on The Unusuals, one season of a TV show just feels right.

After some doubt, Ryan Murphy will, in fact, be involved in the Glee reality show that will give contestants a chance to win a guest stint on Glee. I guess that's one way for a musical competition show to guarantee album sales...

Which sounds dumber, a Pac-Man reality show, or a game show about playing catch? The correct answer is "both."

Could HBO's Garfunkel & Oates TV series be the new Flight of the Conchords? God, I hope so.

And finally, Community will do an episode about Dungeons and Dragons. 'Nuff said.