BLOGS
Before CBS officially fired Charlie Sheen this week, there had been some talk that maybe Chuck Lorre could step away from day-to-day production of Two and a Half Men as a way of keeping the peace if Charlie were to come back. We here at TWoP still think the idea of getting rid of Lorre is pretty good, even if Sheen is already gone, and we have some suggestions about who should replace both of them.
Removing Lorre as showrunner would give Men and its fans a chance to remember Charlie Sheen for those eight years he turned tin cans to gold, while making sure that, by the time the new season starts, everything about Sheen's crazy behavior will be so deep in the show's Wikipedia article that no one bothers to vandalize it. Besides, Men is going on nine years now, and, honestly, Lorre has been scratching the sides of the idea barrel since the middle of the second season. A new showrunner would have fresh ideas and be more willing to change things up, by doing things like actually making an effort to realize that the Half-Man can almost be rounded up at this point. This shake-up would also probably force some of the show's characters away from only ever making creepy vaguely misogynistic jokes toward actually acting something like real people, causing any of us who had written off the show before to take note.
Joss Whedon
It would be surprising how close Whedon would follow the show's original formula, at first. He would bring in his old Buffy/Angel cast member Alexis Denisof to replace Charlie as a character very similar to Denisof's on How I Met Your Mother (but not bald). However, as the show went on, we would find out that Denisof has actually been sent to protect the Half-Man from the government, who wants to use his hidden superpowers for evil.
David Simon
Malibu isn't all jingle writing and loose women. There is a dark and gritty side to it all that the men find out about as they try to help former dealer Andre "Bubbles" Royo clean up and fight the system after the loss of his biggest client, Charlie, causes him to fall on hard times.
Seth MacFarlane
Playing the long-lost other brother of the men, MacFarlane would spend the whole episode remembering the '80s. All of his stories would be complete with cuts to Sheen's old movies with MacFarlane and Jon Cryer edited in.
Aaron Sorkin
Sorkin could easily cast Bradley Whitford as Charlie's former writing partner who split off from Charlie because he wanted to be taken more seriously. We should then all be prepared for discussions of class relations with the housekeeper.
Dan Harmon
Seeing that the show isn't self-aware enough, Harmon would slowly allow the remaining men to begin to see how constructed their world is. Cast Dino Stamatopoulos (a.k.a. Star-burns) as the Half-Man's new music instructor who seems oddly okay with the way the world is falling apart and suddenly the most awesome absurdist drama is complete.
Shonda Rhimes
Bringing in Rhimes would turn the show around a full 180 degrees. Now the lead, played by Jason George, would spend each episode looking for that one special love while trying to gain perspective and strength from his character failings. The Half-Man would also be forced to suffer numerous exotic illnesses, including one that keeps him from ever being able to grow up.
Ryan Murphy
Murphy would mix things up by casting Leslie Grossman, Mary Cherry on Popular, to be the second "man." Murphy would be proud to point to her sleeping around and general Charlie-like behavior as some kind of moral statement for all the kids who watch the show.
J.J. Abrams
Suddenly, everyone would have daddy issues, and Greg Grunberg would be cast so he would quit asking Abrams for a part in the next Star Trek movie.
Kevin Williamson
Williamson would move the show to The CW (where his soul is bound) and cast James Van Der Beek as a womanizer who just can't seem to find the one. Also, he can see ghosts.
Who do you think should take over the show or replace Sheen? Let us know what you think below.
What are people saying about your favorite shows and stars right now? Find out with Talk Without Pity, the social media site for real TV fans. See Tweets and Facebook comments in real time and add your own -- all without leaving TWoP. Join the conversation now!
MOST RECENT POSTS
Today's TWoP News: Wednesday, February 20, 2013
New Girl: Roomate Do's and Don'ts of the Week
Wednesday, February 20, 2013: American Idol
Today's TWoP News: Tuesday, February 19, 2013
Saturday Night Live: The Best Sketches of the Night
TV on DVD: Tuesday, February 19, 2013
Tuesday, February 19, 2013: Cult
I Want My DVD: Tuesday, February 19, 2013
BLOG ARCHIVES
The Telefile
February 2013
21 Entries
January 2013
62 Entries
December 2012
44 Entries
November 2012
59 Entries
October 2012
69 Entries
September 2012
66 Entries
August 2012
65 Entries
July 2012
51 Entries
June 2012
58 Entries
May 2012
68 Entries
April 2012
71 Entries
March 2012
68 Entries
February 2012
64 Entries
January 2012
78 Entries
December 2011
49 Entries
November 2011
56 Entries
October 2011
74 Entries
September 2011
77 Entries
August 2011
61 Entries
July 2011
56 Entries
June 2011
57 Entries
May 2011
57 Entries
April 2011
78 Entries
March 2011
73 Entries
February 2011
57 Entries
January 2011
65 Entries
December 2010
39 Entries
November 2010
45 Entries
October 2010
46 Entries
September 2010
62 Entries
August 2010
55 Entries
July 2010
53 Entries
June 2010
65 Entries
May 2010
59 Entries
April 2010
57 Entries
March 2010
67 Entries
February 2010
53 Entries
January 2010
59 Entries
December 2009
32 Entries
November 2009
47 Entries
October 2009
65 Entries
September 2009
66 Entries
August 2009
58 Entries
July 2009
72 Entries
June 2009
71 Entries
May 2009
50 Entries
April 2009
57 Entries
March 2009
66 Entries
February 2009
52 Entries
January 2009
56 Entries
December 2008
51 Entries
November 2008
71 Entries
October 2008
88 Entries
September 2008
86 Entries
August 2008
120 Entries
July 2008
115 Entries
June 2008
90 Entries
May 2008
44 Entries
April 2008
30 Entries
March 2008
26 Entries
February 2008
30 Entries
January 2008
44 Entries
December 2007
31 Entries
November 2007
66 Entries
Comments