Things I really hate:
Howie Mandel
Flash mobs
Choreographers Tabitha and Napoleon, a.k.a "NappyTabs"
Cloggers
Surprise weddings
Practical jokes
Chris Brown's "Forever" and any wedding dance numbers using it
Jokes about Howie Mandel's penis

Yes, all these were in just one episode. I can only imagine the horrors that future installments may have in store. Here's the gist of what happened: Howie Mandel found some poor schlub who wanted to propose to his girlfriend and turned it into a chaotic mess. First, Howie found out that the guy's girlfriend was a jealous type and then he found out that the guy couldn't dance. So, obviously, the choice here is to put the presumably nervous guy in a scene where an actress comes over, pretends to be a scorned lover and throws water on him. And then while his girlfriend is dragged through some studio back lot and inundated with cloggers, marching bands and cheerleaders, he gets changed and then does some dance that involves pelvic thrusting. And then after the groom-to-be proposes and does his gross little dirty dance to that overused Chris Brown song (which just proves that NappyTabs always go for the most obvious shit possible), extra dancers throw her into an ill-fitting wedding gown and they get "married" in front of strangers in the middle of this back lot.

If I were the "lucky" gal getting proposed to, I probably would have hightailed it out of there the second a waiter started singing, and if they'd dragged me to the middle of this square and my boyfriend proposed and then expected me to get married on the spot in front of Howie Mandel with some hammy justice of the peace, I'd probably punch him in the face. And this is why I'm single. The girl on the show seemed charmed by this, but frankly, after Howie Mandel (whose cell phone makes a sproingy noise) asked if we could hear the excitement in his pants, I was pretty much done with this show.... which probably means that people will love it and it will live on for like ten seasons.

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