Rob Mariano, best known as Boston Rob, is cashing in on his Survivor/Amazing Race fame with a new show that won't force him to share the spotlight with other dirty and starving people. He and some guy who made a monster truck (yes, really) are going to be doing a History Channel show called Around the World in 80 Ways. The duo will have to travel around the globe via various modes of transportation without ever using any of them more than once (we look forward to the dirigible). Between this and seeing Colby Donaldson happily handling weaponry on Top Shot, it made us think of what kinds of series we'd like to see from other Survivor alums, given their unique qualifications.
Judson "Fabio" Birza
His show could be called Extreme Skateboarding. Since the dimwitted winner of Survivor: Nicaragua was arrested for skateboarding under the influence (who knew that was even possible?), we'd like to see him do all manner of heel flips and ollies. The big question is if he'd even care that he was doing a show or if he would get bored of filming halfway through and take a nap.
A more dangerous version of Minute to Win It seems like it would be up his alley considering a ball to the face once caused him to lose a tooth. Instead of competing against the clock, contestants would compete against J.T. in random challenges and judging would be based not only on the ability to complete a task, but also to withstand pain when money is on the line.
Her show could be America's Next Great Campfire Singer. Manthey would act as judge and mentor to tone-deaf people who think that being out in the wild at night means that they can belt out tunes at the top of their lungs. Obviously, Jerri would have to reprise her own rendition of Fiona Apple (complete with her stupid cowboy hat) in order to inspire the wannabes to let loose.
In Out of This World with Russell Hantz, the petite fella would be on the first manned mission to Mars. What's that? We lost the signal and can't actually see his transmissions where he hits on the young, blonde astronaut with him? That's too bad.
Did they already find a host for IFC's Whisker Wars? Can Ralph co-host?
Osten Taylor and NaOnka Mixon
Two of Survivor's most infamous quitters could host a History channel show that finds famous dropouts to see how their lives have turned out.
Maybe we wouldn't give him his own show, but can we get him on an All-Star Wipeout? This athletic kid should be able to sail through any balance, swimming and climbing challenges put before him.
Jenna Morasca and Heidi Strobel
This duo could go across America asking people what they would do for peanut butter and chocolate. Would they strip naked in front of cameras? After all, they did.
His show could be Back to Basics: Nudists Around the World. Richard has had some troubles since his first stint on Survivor, but he's smart enough to know that he was famous for being naked and making people uncomfortable. Once his legal issues get hammered out, he can travel the world exploring how nudists are perceived in different cultures. We already feel bad for the underpaid editor in charge of blurring.
Since the extended Mariano family needs to keep cashing in on their Survivor fame, Ambah should get her own show as well. It could be a Travel Channel series where the girl from Beaver, PA visits the most peculiarly named towns in the country to uncover their unique charms.
Benjamin "Coach" Wade and Phil "Don't Call Me Crazy" Sheppard
These two are cut from the same cloth, and both have a penchant for coming up with outrageous and highly exaggerated tales about their past. In a new twist on To Tell the Truth, the Former Federal Agent (?) and the former soccer coach will be dropped in remote places for a week, then have to return back to a studio with a story. Contestants will then have to guess whose tale is ridiculous and whose contains a kernel of truth. Might we suggest Lying Liars Who Lie for the title?
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