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Would the Cast of Glee Survive The Glee Project?

Have I made it clear that I'm really into The Glee Project? I'm not trying to say it's revolutionary television or anything, but it definitely makes you wonder about the current Glee cast. Sure, Fox put 'em through the whole casting tape and live audition process, but how would they perfomr if forced to go through Oxygen's wringer? The Glee Project judges are tough on the competitors, and come up with some pretty small -- and often arbitrary -- reasons to boot someone off the show. Popular grounds include: Not talented enough, Ryan Murphy would in no way be able to write for them, and -- seemingly the most important factor in this competition -- they would clearly be a pain in the ass to work with on set. Let's see how the current New Directions crew stacks up.

Lea Michele
Talent-ality?: She's definitely got the voice, her acting is there, and I don't necessarily think of her as a bad dancer, per se.
Ryan Murphy-ality?: As a Jewish girl with a big voice, Lea gets most of the standard "nerdy drama girl" storylines. It works, but Murphy did have to throw in two gay dads just to make her slightly more unique.
Terrible-ality?: She's a notoriously nightmarish diva who gets highly offended when people don't know who she is.
Keep Holding On?: Cue the Avril, please.

Cory Monteith
Talent-ality?: He can sometimes sing, act pretty well, and has to stand in the back during all the big dance numbers because he is THAT bad.
Ryan Murphy-ality?: A jock with a softer side? It can be a stretch sometimes, but Murphy can generally handle Finn.
Terrible-ality?: Did you know Monteith was a wild child and went to rehab? It actually would bode well for him in The Glee Project, especially since he seems like a decent person now.
Keep Holding On?: Considering the fact that Damian is trying to be some weird Irish rip-off of him and actually kind of succeeding (don't get me started), he'd definitely at least make it this far. Ultimately, though, Monteith's lack of something truly unique would send him packing.

Kevin McHale
Talent-ality?: His singing skills are fine, his rapping skills are even better, and he's a pretty fun actor. Besides knowing how to rock a wheelchair, the one redeeming part of Artie's "Safety Dance" number was that we learned that McHale could, indeed, dance if he wanted to.
Ryan Murphy-ality?: What is his unique personality, exactly? He's good at being a nerd, but if Artie wasn't in a wheelchair, he would be a less interesting Glee character for sure. That being said, McHale does have a certain charming presence about him. As for Muprhy-ality, the fact that Murphy doesn't portray Artie as just "the kid in the wheelchair" shows that he is capable for writing for him.
Terrible-ality?: Hard to tell. He does give off the impression that he's a likeable guy who's comfortable in his own geekiness, but he was also willingly in a Katy Perry video.
Keep Holding On?: Unless he was a dick to a coach or there was someone better looking than him, McHale could be a worthy competitor.

Harry Shum Jr.
Talent-ality?: If case you've been living in a cave: The dude can dance. It's hard to say if he's a terrible singer since he never actually opens his mouth during musical numbers, but we gonna assume there's a reason for that. And as for acting, the mere fact that we know Mike Chang's name does say a little something about Shum's personality.
Ryan Murphy-ality?: He actually fits in amazingly well with the original Glee regulars, so much so that we can't tell if Chang or Shum came first.
Terrible-ality?: He seems like a perfectly nice guy.
Keep Holding On?: While there is dancing and a teeny bit of acting on The Glee Project, singing is top priority. There's no way Shum could hold up as just a dancer for the entire 10 weeks.

Dianna Agron
Talent-ality?: Great singer and dancer, but her acting often teeters the line of over-the-top and completely mundane.
Ryan Murphy-ality?: Dianna is a picturesque blonde-haired, blue-eyed actress -- clay, basically.
Terrible-ality?: Apparently, she's the closest you can get to a real-life Disney Princess, and not in an annoying Tenley-from-The Bachelor kind of way.
Keep Holding On?: Unfortunately, this competition weighs heavily on Murphy's serial misogyny (please refer to Nip/Tuck for all further questions) and, if you're a girl, you'll have to do one better than just being really talented with a great personality. If Dianna was actually pregnant or something, maybe she'd have a chance. Maaaybe.

Chris Colfer
Talent-ality?: Total triple threat.
Ryan Murphy-ality?: Oh, absolutely. Colfer got the shaft in Season 2, but in Season 1, Kurt had some of the best story arcs that a gay teen living in the Midwest could hope for.
Terrible-ality?: Not quite convinced he's wonderful? This should do the trick.
Keep Holding On?: At the end of the day, could a non-famous Colfer stack up to powerhouse Alex? It's not the easiest question in the world.

Naya Rivera
Talent-ality?: Two words: Trouty Mouth.
Ryan Murphy-ality?: Besides her lesbian storyline, Murphy is often terrible at writing for Santana. See: Her quest for prom queen.
Terrible-ality?: She seems like a sweet enough person. And her parability is outstanding.
Keep Holding On?: Was Season 1 Santana that different from flirtatious Glee Project contestant Emily? Even now, if vampy/cool Marissa got sent home, it's entirely possible that one disconnected day would ruin it for Rivera. And did I mention she's a girl?

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8 Comments

August 1, 2011 2:33 PM
Ems
Reply

Gonna have to disagree on Agron's singing ability. Girl needs to fix the deviated septum something fierce.

I think Naya would have made it, I mean the 1st season was basically just a giant audition for her to get into the main cast.

We now know that Chord Overstreet didn't stand a chance and he had the triple threat+ positive attitude going for him.

That said, I think Glee Project is Samuel's to lose, unless Lindsey plans on announcing that she's bi-sexual or something

August 1, 2011 2:40 PM
ems
Reply

Diana Agron is not a great singer, she is at best a decent singer with a pretty face.

Naya would win the competition seeing as season 1 was basically the Glee Project style Audition for her to become a regular.

Triple Threats don't mean anything considering Chord Overstreet was dropped.

Samuel's going to win it unless Lindsey manages to bring some major backstory

August 1, 2011 4:02 PM
Leona
Reply

Yeah, I couldn't see Diana making it past week 4 if she were a "Project" contestant-especially if the rest of the "project" cast were what it is now. And Ryan Murphy is a total douche anyway-the crap that was pulled last night had me screaming at my TV. I can't believe Marissa was sent home last week just so that Cameron can quit. And really, this show has spent so much time casting Lindsay as a villian, I will be utterly shocked if she's even part of the inevitable Sam/Damian final two. However, I did laugh out loud when Ryan compaired Damian to Corey last night-it took that for me to figure out why exactly I didn't like Damien-he is just like Corey-ok voice, boyish looks, not a great dancer but for some reason I just don't get people freak right the hell out over them. Maybe it's because I'm out of puberty?

August 1, 2011 6:22 PM
cdv102
Reply

It's all about Damien's accent. If he could send his accent out on stage every time he had to sing for his life, that's all he'd need. Alas, the rest of him must come too.

I'm actually not bowled over by any of the Glee Project kids. They've already gotten rid of some of my favorites for really stupid reasons, IMO. What kind of laziness is that on the part of the writers that they're putting the responsibility of creating a character on the backs of these kids? Isn't creating a character kind of the creator's job?? The kids are supposed to be actors, no? Argh. That bugs me something awful.

August 1, 2011 7:45 PM
Lucy
Reply

Why buy into the Lea Michele rumours? Girl openly likes to spend her time as a homebody, singing, and advocating for animal rights. The diva rumours aren't fact, and she's not her character. Why perpertuate this crap?

August 1, 2011 10:45 PM
JC
Reply

Stop putting bing links in the articles. Sometimes they're right next to the actual links and now my computer has a million pop-ups all over the place. If this keeps up, I'll quit reading these.

August 2, 2011 10:27 AM
Dan
Reply

So the "small and arbitrary reasons" for getting rid of these people are that they don't have talent, are a pain in the ass, or the writers couldn't do anything with them? What? As poor as the Glee writers are, these are all great reasons for getting rid of people.

August 2, 2011 2:02 PM
WTP
Reply

I love the Glee Project but I can't stand Alex and will be so mad if he wins. He has a great voice except for the high crap they love but his personality is horrible. And I was so mad that Marrissa got cut just because she was to pretty. Sometime Ryan Murphy is such a jerk.

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