The second season finale of the trainwreck known as Bachelor Pad aired last night and the episode itself was kind of forgettable... the only worthwhile thing that happened was that Michael and Holly decided to take Michelle and Graham to the finale with them instead of Vienna and Kasey. (Yes, Vienna was crushed because her perfect rose record was demolished.) The rest of the time was spent with the pairs flying around in some Cirque Du Soleil harnesses to impress former Bachelor alums Trista, Jason and Ali (carried onto the stage by Roberto). But the reunion? That was where the fun actually started. Here are the highlights:

We must confess/That your suckiness/Is bringing us down/So give us a sign/Please get good again one more time.

If you want an Emmy, you might have to sing for it.

We add insult to injuries in today's news.

Elvis has left the building. Not as quickly as we wanted him to, but still. Here's the worst of the worst from reality TV this past week, but who was the biggest loser of them all?

We're anxiously waiting for new cable shows American Horror Story and Hell on Wheels, but since we haven't screened them yet, we have to withhold our final judgment (if nothing else, we're hoping Hell fills the Deadwood-shaped hole in our hearts). And while The X Factor will likely be insanely popular, we can't say that it will actually be good (not that it matters; we'll watch every minute). But we have seen the pilots for virtually every scripted show coming to broadcast TV this fall, and judging by their first episodes, we can confidently recommend setting your DVRs for these ten at the very least:

Prepare yourself for many a monologue about the industry...

It's a great day for TV shows and people we actually like.

And then there were two (and a half).

Good news for Norbit fans!