In Regards to His Wedding Registry
"Looks like I'm finally going to have that darling little earthenware asparagus dish I've always wanted."

On Leonard's Key to A Happy Long-Distance Relationship
"Playing nerd games with us and then taking a suspiciously long shower?"

His Qualms With Those Nerd Games
"We're playing dungeons and dragons and we walk into a dungeon and see a dragon? Isn't that a little on the nose?"

Even More Hidden Skills
"I don't want to show any more of your friends how I can fit in the booster seats."

On Raj Going In for a Post-Date Kiss with His Deaf Date
"I speak sign language. I don't read minds."

He Apparently Runs a Monarchy We Didn't Know About
"Yeah, but I'm the make-out king."

In Defense of Starring at Hot Girls at the Gym
"Bernadette doesn't mind where I get my motor running, as long as I park in the right garage."

You Can't Have Sex With Cheesecake, Can You?
"Try putting it in the microwave for a few seconds."

Some bonus love goes to the "vastly wealthy" Papa Koothrappali (who has an amount of money that is "about halfway between Bruce Wayne and Scrooge McDuck."), who wasn't impressed that Raj was showering his new girlfriend with gifts, not matter what he was getting in return. "I'm a gynecologist. I know exactly what she gives you."

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