Donald Trump (Darrell Hammond)
Darrell Hammond isn't an SNL ensemble player anymore, but Lorne Michaels still invites him to drop by whenever The Donald happens to be in the headlines again. This time, Hammond was called upon to send up Trump's recent plan to moderate yet another GOP debate. Bobby Moynihan's Newt Gingrich and Andy Samberg's Rick Santorum (the only two Republican candidates that have so far agreed to participate in said debate) were seated on either side of faux-Donald with Kristen Wiig's Greta Van Susteren pitched him questions/gag set-ups, but this was really Hammond's skit to run with and he did his usual shtick, playing Trump as an egomaniacal, intellectually-challenged boob (which isn't so hard, to be honest) that likes to describe things as "huuuuge." Though he didn't get the chance to say that about Katy Perry's own boobs; she didn't pop up in the cold open, even as Trump's wife Melania -- the one he describes as having a "great rig."
Most Boobish Line: "You know Greta, I've been very successful in my life. And my wife is very hot and very young. Also I own many properties and they're all very large."

John Cavanagh-san (Taran Killam) and Rebecca Sternmarkowitz-san (Vanessa Bayer)
The painfully Caucasian hosts of the Michigan State Campus-produced program J-Pop American Funtime Now made their second appearance this week, once again trying to honor Japanese culture, fashion and music-aru in the least authentic way imaginable. Even the university's Japanese Cultural Society refuses to endorse their program, largely because Cavanagh-san and Sternmarkowitz-san are "extremely annoying." We can't exactly argue with that, but we enjoy this sketch anyway, especially when poor Japanese Studies teacher, Mark Kauffman, points out all the ways in which these two boobs are misrepresenting Japanese culture. Chalk it up to the spirited performances by the adorable Killam and Bayer, two featured players that deserve to be upgraded to the repertory company.
Most Boobish Line: "Surely, you look so Japanese!"

Captain Steve Rogers (Alec Baldwin)
As soon as Alec Baldwin got removed from that plane, his appearance on this week's SNL was a foregone conclusion. But at least he and the writers came up with a creative approach to his cameo, having Baldwin play himself-playing-a-fake-American-Airlines-pilot named Steve Rogers (kudos to whoever came up with what we're assuming was a deliberate Captain America reference) who "apologized" to Alec Baldwin and described the actor only in the most glowing terms. Sure inventing a televised sock puppet is the sort of thing only a real boob would do, but we can't help but sympathize a little with Baldwin. After all, Words With Friends is really, really addictive.
Most Boobish Line: "We would have gotten away with it, but Alec Baldwin was just too smart for us."

Al Sharpton (Kenan Thompson)
In real life, Al Sharpton is one of the most media-savvy guys around. But the SNL writers know by now that Thompson is generally funniest when he's playing dumb, so his version of the Reverend is a big ol' boob who can't even tell which camera he should look into while hosting his news show Politics Nation. This sketch was so boring, it almost made us miss "What Up With That." Almost.
Most Boobish Line: "Wrong camera? Well, which one is it? The red light? There's red lights everywhere!"

Rebecca (Katy Perry) and Mike (Bobby Moynihan)
Perry finally flashed a glimpse of her famous cleavage in the evening's last sketch, playing a little Miss Lonely Hearts with a tattoo of Jewel above her décolletage that meets her boobish soul mate Mike in a singles dive. (Though she did let the twins breath a bit earlier in the evening while playing Christina Aguilera in that fake movie trailer about the apocalypse.) Like so many final sketches, this one didn't seem to have much of a point... until Rebecca fell down that elevator shaft. As punchlines go, that was pretty memorable.
Most Boobish Line: "Also, someone should take a look at that elevator."

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