From the get go, we knew what was going to happen with that stupid horseback riding trophy -- symbol rather than actual money-holder, triumph of spirit, blah blah blah. Maybe I'm just biased because I really like the "Celebrate Ricky Sargolesh" episode of Party Down, but I'm all for Steven Weber joining this cast as Martin Channing, as his character isn't horribly outwardly offensive (I think; more on that in a second), at least when it comes to his ethnicity/religion/gender/sexual orientation. Weber played off Kat Dennings and Beth Behr's chemistry well... relative to 2 Broke Girls' standards, anyways.

Obviously, like all episodes of this series, I groaned more than I laughed, and since CBS doesn't include a groan-track, I suggest following along with this guide so that you know when you're supposed to roll your eyes and feel embarrassed for even watching this show.

- Of course we're opening up the season with a breastfeeding gag. There was a pretty good Game of Thrones joke in there, though I'm not sure if it was an intentional reference to Lysa Arryn and freaky little Robin, or if the writers were just trying to make a one-liner about HBO having a lot of boobs on their shows. Something tells me it was the latter.

- Oleg asking Sophie out on a date, with her replying, "Can't you just come over and ruin my sheets like you usually do?" Sometimes I watch these actors and just think about how they're two English-speaking people forced into using these borderline grotesque fake Eastern European accents.

- The joke about Caroline's long face hair, the fifth time it was made.

- The soft side of Martin Channing being the primary portrayal we see. Is this show trying to make Bernie Madoff more sympathetic? They know the real-life Martin Channing financially ruined not just individuals and businesses, but entire charities, right?

- "Wow, you had all of these closets and no one in your family is gay?" followed by the same joke over and over again about how that one relative of Caroline's is probably totally gay, ha ha because he enjoyed styling hair and doing Caroline's makeup.

- Sophie orgasming at the very word "gold," and then later complaining about not orgasming enough during the action.

- The gay stereotype with the little dog (but don't worry, they're not in love because he's not crazy, just hilariously homosexual) who at one point said, "Back out now, ladies. I'm a paddle bitch."

As for my own countdown:
Minute I stopped paying attention and had to rewind: 7:00. And later, 26:00.

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