With only one episode left of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo (this season, anyway), the editing monkeys are trying to squeeze out some ridiculous quotes while obviously saving the cream of the crop for next week's "family sized" finale. That doesn't mean "Ah-choo!" wasn't fun and disturbing... emphasis on the latter. Here's a quick look at what you're probably very glad you missed:
The episode opens with a sign that says "Let's Keep Georgia Peachy Clean," and then cameras show a decrepit toilet, and then a gutted dresser and couch.
June hires a makeup artist to teach her how to apply it onto her daughter herself, but she ultimately fails when she can't find Alana's eyebrow.
The family plays bingo with the intention of making money, and when they do not win, Alana accuses everyone else of cheating and then tries to cheat herself.
"Bingo is mama's sport." - Pumpkin
Alana holds a handheld mirror while staring at her reflection eating a brownie.
"If I don't talk with my mouth full, when am I gonna talk?" - Alana
Alana stuff her face with cake, eats with her hands and passes gas at the table sitting next to Michaela Lackey, Miss Georgia 2011.
"Miss Georgia 2011, she's very pretty, and I don't think she farts." - Alana
For Alana's birthday, her sisters take Pop-Tarts, a jug of extra hot hot sauce and body wash off of June's shelf and wrap them in copious amounts of tape. (To be fair, Alana loves her gifts and it puts that crazy stockpile to use.)
June cannot climb up an inflatable slide, which her loved ones blame on her forklift foot, gravity and fear.
"The party was very, very exhausting. For the rest of the day, I'm gonna sit on my couch. I'm gonna vegetate my fat ass." - June
In a TH, Alana sneezes and snot shoots out of her nose, all over her face. The footage of her just sitting there with her hand covering her nose and mouth lasts for no less than 73 seconds. A "#booboosneeze" hashtag even appears on the screen, and bugs start crawling all over the child. Then, the episode just ends.
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