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8:05: The fancy folks (Jessica Chastain FTW) are getting themselves seated, steadying themselves for the entrance of ol' Stewie himself. Watch this space as we prepare to snark through Hollywood's annual celebration of itself.
8:15: Are we the only ones hoping that one of the items in the Oscar mystery boxes on the red carpet is that severed horse head from The Godfather?
8:22: Smash producers being interviewed. Kristin Chenowerth lies through her teeth, saying, "I think it's in the right hands."
8:25: Five minutes to showtime. Renee Zellweger is so excited, her face almost moved.
8:30: And here we go...
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